it must be love, or brain damage....
When i was about 12 i lost my virginity (no this isnt a bragging post) anyway it was to a girl called 'tammy' (im sure she was a girl i checked) anyway tammy and i lasted about 6 months till this 18 year old found out how old i was... anyway since then ive bounced between relationships, one night stands, 2 night stands 2 in a night stands and standing in the brixton acadamy stands.
but ive always been looking for love, some one to unconditonally love me. it wasnt the sex thing, belive it or not sex isnt that important to me - it was the feeling of being with someone having there attention knowing they wanted to be with me - thats what 'sex' means to me, physical comunication of the purist form.
lifes never really been a bucket of roses but its not exaclty been that bad either, but the one thing ive been looking for is some one who could understand me and understand my needs (like motorbikes and flumps)- time and again ive made mistakes, but then havnt we all?
im not young anymore, im getting old and the grey hair is setting in, soon i will be 'THE OLD NUMBER' and when that happens i have a feeling im going to be a wreck an unconsolable wreck.
as i get closer to this age things ive said before become less and less important, infact my views on life change dramatically for instance:
i quite like ikea furniture, in fact id rather like a nice sofa matching side boards telly stand and speaker stands. - its rather well made too and in-expensive.
i dont really mind volvo's that much anymore - i know why people drive them its to be safe in the knowledge they are in one of the best cars on the road - safety wise.
not all BMW drivers are wankers - i mean i even know a guy who has one, and his a bloody hippy.
germans arnt all boring nazi's
not all the french want to steal england and make it into a giant disney complex - how ever they are all wimps .
veg is good for you.
and the big one....
id quite like a wife and kids one day, a 2.5 happy unit with a dog called ackbar. id like a nice little house with a sensible garden i can grow plants in, a garage for the car and the kids bikes, a little shed i can potter about in working on motorbike engines or making beer - id love to make beer - anyway - i want to have a nice wife who in my eyes is the most pretty girl in the whole world and will be forever 25. and who loves and adores me the way i do her.
i know alot of you say dont regret the past, well i have alot to regret, because everything i just detailed, i cant have. ill never get, i mean never, i made mistakes that will hanunt me for the rest of my life, mistakes that have changed the course of my life forever, and that makes me sad.
still ive still got the memorys of the *** girls ive slept with, the parties i went to and the drug fuled anarchy of my younger years.
watching the sun come up over milton keynes (yes milton keynes) on ecstacy (real stuff as well, not the crap they call E these days) with a girl in my arms surrounded by concrete cows was the most amazing moment of my life - know what? i cant remember her name, and she prolly cant remember mine - and id give all of what ive done in my life up for a child a wife and a sensible car.
i regret loosing my virginity so young - it started me on a quest to find something that i will never find, and a seriously wasted youth... and stole the chance off me in the long run to ever have a normal meaningful relationship with any body
but ive always been looking for love, some one to unconditonally love me. it wasnt the sex thing, belive it or not sex isnt that important to me - it was the feeling of being with someone having there attention knowing they wanted to be with me - thats what 'sex' means to me, physical comunication of the purist form.
lifes never really been a bucket of roses but its not exaclty been that bad either, but the one thing ive been looking for is some one who could understand me and understand my needs (like motorbikes and flumps)- time and again ive made mistakes, but then havnt we all?
im not young anymore, im getting old and the grey hair is setting in, soon i will be 'THE OLD NUMBER' and when that happens i have a feeling im going to be a wreck an unconsolable wreck.
as i get closer to this age things ive said before become less and less important, infact my views on life change dramatically for instance:
i quite like ikea furniture, in fact id rather like a nice sofa matching side boards telly stand and speaker stands. - its rather well made too and in-expensive.
i dont really mind volvo's that much anymore - i know why people drive them its to be safe in the knowledge they are in one of the best cars on the road - safety wise.
not all BMW drivers are wankers - i mean i even know a guy who has one, and his a bloody hippy.
germans arnt all boring nazi's
not all the french want to steal england and make it into a giant disney complex - how ever they are all wimps .
veg is good for you.
and the big one....
id quite like a wife and kids one day, a 2.5 happy unit with a dog called ackbar. id like a nice little house with a sensible garden i can grow plants in, a garage for the car and the kids bikes, a little shed i can potter about in working on motorbike engines or making beer - id love to make beer - anyway - i want to have a nice wife who in my eyes is the most pretty girl in the whole world and will be forever 25. and who loves and adores me the way i do her.
i know alot of you say dont regret the past, well i have alot to regret, because everything i just detailed, i cant have. ill never get, i mean never, i made mistakes that will hanunt me for the rest of my life, mistakes that have changed the course of my life forever, and that makes me sad.
still ive still got the memorys of the *** girls ive slept with, the parties i went to and the drug fuled anarchy of my younger years.
watching the sun come up over milton keynes (yes milton keynes) on ecstacy (real stuff as well, not the crap they call E these days) with a girl in my arms surrounded by concrete cows was the most amazing moment of my life - know what? i cant remember her name, and she prolly cant remember mine - and id give all of what ive done in my life up for a child a wife and a sensible car.
i regret loosing my virginity so young - it started me on a quest to find something that i will never find, and a seriously wasted youth... and stole the chance off me in the long run to ever have a normal meaningful relationship with any body