Well this is it, now. Everybody get down... [Open]

[requiem_no_ame]

Characters: Squalo and Bel, and anyone who wants to be a victim
Location: The Carnival
Rating: PG-13, probably going up for language. Or homicide attempts
Time: Last day of the carnival.
Description: Come along and meet the fruits of eighteen years of Squalo's nurturing talents.

Comments

[kirikizamuyo]

Bel noticed the change in Squalo almost immediately. It was hard not to with how well he knew the shark. He also could feel the approach, though probably not nearly as strong as Squalo did. Though it was not from any sort of connection with Boss, merely the instinct that came with so many years of being aware of his surroundings no matter what, he knew when an aura of power was near and there was only one he knew of that was so full of rage.

Though the difference this time was enough to put him on knife's edge. Something was off and he would put all bets on the fact it had to do with Squalo's injuries. There was no mistake in his mind. Had he been there, he would have helped Squalo. He was fiercely loyal to Xanxus, him and-...him and Mammon had proved as much when they unfroze Xanxus during the ring battles. He would have been screwed if they hadn't been so loyal at the time.

But even still, he wasn't there. Not when Bel was growing up. Not like Squalo and the others had been. He wasn't sure if it would make any difference if the man had been there, but there was a good chance since he had been very impressionable at that age.

As it stood, when Squalo stepped between them like that Bel stepped forward to rest his arms on Squalo's shoulders in a relaxed position, his chin casually propped up on them. Partly in hopes of letting Squalo know he wasn't going to leave him alone despite the time differences and partly to let Xanxus remember just who had raised him as a child. The grin on his face was unreadable, at least to Xanxus. He wasn't around, didn't know well enough to see passed the tiny differences in Bel's stance. And he was pretty sure that most likely annoyed the hell out of the older man.

"Fancy seeing you around in a place like this. I thought you didn't like carnivals Boss~"

[fridgeburnt]

"I don't," Xanxus snarled. Nothing that Bel and Squalo did were lost to him, and that's just fine, that perfectly fucking fine. "A brat through and through, aren't we? Just when you think the Prince has grown, you can never resist hanging on to that fucking trash's hand for dear life. How is your brother, by the way? He looked exactly as pathetic as you did when he fell to the ground."

He glared at Squalo, still seething, but more in control now. What was he supposed to say? 'I came here to beat the shit out of you'? 'Do you realize how close I am to killing myself'? 'Do you know that what you've done is perfectly irreparable, and even if you think it fucking helps, it doesn't'? The older one would understand. The older one would know. But this Squalo isn't the one he wants in this world, and he hates having to put up with such fucking inconveniences. He growled. "Your brat, Superbi. Put him in line. He's your responsibility, like that fucking rain-brat of yours."

[requiem_no_ame]

Squalo's elbow slammed into Bel's flank on reflex. But he didn't take his eyes off Xanxus, couldn't take his eyes off Xanxus, unless it was to bow his head. Every single gesture of submission lately had been deliberate, poignant. Squalo bowed his head far lower than he usually did.

"Of course, Boss," a tilt of his head, acknowledgement to his orders and another small sign of submission. The thing was, Squalo always made sure to not be afraid when he did, because the last thing he wanted was Xanxus thinking he was bowing down just because he was afraid. "I'll deal with them. Both of them."

He was ignoring Bel, and he realized it and he knew he'd have something coming for that, but there was no question in Squalo's mind, who was more important and who needed to be pacified first, always.

[kirikizamuyo]

Bel kept a close watch on Xanxus' reactions and as such his theory was proven right. He would always be on Squalo's side, no matter what the consequences, but as he paid attention he could guess what was going on. Boss had changed over the years, one way or another, but Squalo here was still young and didn't understand that. No doubt confusion and mistakes came along. Keeping up with Xanxus took practice, and this one was a few years short of the upgrades.

Though sadly, Bel was missing a few years on that himself. But as much as it made his entire body give a violent twitch, so much he didn't even feel that jab from the shark, he held himself back and decided to keep his mouth shut. After hearing his brother mentioned, nothing he said would keep him from getting the shit beat out of him. Of course the bastard would bring up that cockroach. Just proof that Boss was in a shitty spiteful mood. Just. Fucking. Great.

[requiem_no_ame]

The conversation was tense and meaningless. Squalo ground his teeth and let it slide as he watched Xanxus stalk away, at least thankful no further shows of violence were necessary. He didn't relax, though, even with Bel thrown over his shoulders like that.

"Don't you ever do that again," Squalo hissed after a moment, long after Xanxus was out of sight.

[kirikizamuyo]

Bel was tense himself as it was. But he waited, of course he did. It was Squalo speaking up that broke the silent trance Bel had put himself in. Almost immediately he snapped. The prince's fist made contact with the first hard wall close to them, hard enough to draw blood. Though luckily, his gazed seemed to be on the ground, Boss' little comment still fresh in his mind. Maybe he had grown out of it a little bit, maybe he was too pissed to slip into that blood lust, or maybe he just hadn't noticed his hand bleeding yet.

Either way, it was obvious something Xanxus said set him off. Though he didn't expect Squalo to understand anything about that brother comment. After a minute of calming down his labored breathing, he finally spoke. "A prince doesn't make mistakes twice."

[requiem_no_ame]

Squalo flinched as he felt Bel shift and stepped forward so he could turn around and face the brat. There was something off, and he could bet his right hand Xanxus had something to do with it. Stupid fucktard of a boss lashing out at the people that stood closest to him, always.

"I know," Squalo placed a hand on Bel's shoulder and leaned in so he'd be looking up at Bel's face, purposely putting the boy above him to try and pacify his temper. "And I know I can trust the Prince to know better than that. Because I taught you better than that."

He'd noticed the bleeding hand, of course he had, he was aware he was standing in front of a ticking time bomb, but he needed a moment to weight how to deal with it. Because of course, this was Bel but not his Bel, and of course he had to work things about because they weren't the same.

Squalo was fucking tired of feeling inadequate and displaced within his own fucking family.

[kirikizamuyo]

At that angle, as Bel tilted his head a bit Squalo could probably see the bangs move aside. Perhaps a deliberate move on the prince's part. Those pale blue eyes filled with frustration almost to the point of tears. It seems he hadn't noticed his hand at all, the pain just being a dull throb to him in the haze he had fallen into.

Not caring too much that they were in public Bel let his head fall forward onto Squalo's shoulder, almost burying against it as his hands clutched onto the front of his shirt. His voice was muffled, even more so as he was practically whispering. "I couldn't beat him. Even after eighteen years, he was still better than me... Boss is never going to let me live it down..."

[requiem_no_ame]

If Squalo was surprised by the sight of Bel's eyes - he was, striking was the only adjective that ever came close to making them justice, and the mix of emotions in them right now was particularly staggering - he didn't let it show. Rather, he let one of his arms fall around Bel's waist and the other curl at his neck, holding the boy unflinchingly.

"Boss is being a fucking dick about shit," he said eventually, fingers running along Bel's spine, "but he'll get over it."

He wondered if Xanxus was on a roll, alienating everyone that stood close to him or if it was just the heat getting to his fucking head. He hated that, and he hated that whatever he'd said had nailed close enough to make Bel feel that way. And of course, he did it right after he told Squalo that Bel was his responsibility. Not that it needed to be said, because Bel was of the few responsibilities Squalo didn't really mind looking after.

Still, he kept his tone open and didn't pry, if Bel wanted him to know the details, he'd come around to telling him. The last thing the kid needed, really, was someone demanding answers. Squalo had never been good at demanding things of Bel, anyway, beyond a few ground rules.

[kirikizamuyo]

Bel didn't shift too much aside from his hands moving from the front of Squalo's shirt to almost around his waist. He didn't want to seem too desperate, but he liked the comfort.

"My brother came back. Byakuran somehow made him alive... Same age as me. We were on a mission, looking for one of Byakuran's funeral wreaths. All of Varia spread out across the forest looking... Me and Fran... Mammon's... replacement... We found him. It was my brother. We didn't stand a chance. He would have killed both of us if it weren't for Fran using his illusions at the last second to hide us. ...Boss killed my brother effortlessly not even minutes after that..."

Bel almost really was crying by this point. Not so much from the incident, perhaps, but admitting to Squalo that Mammon had a replacement in his time.

[requiem_no_ame]

Squalo tried to digest the influx of information without flinching, but it was really fucking hard. He'd always been adaptive, he'd always known how to bend and twist and not break, despite the lovely curve balls life loved throwing at him. Oh god, he did not just use a baseball metaphor. God fucking damn Yamamoto Takeshi and his fucking baseball bullshit. But even this seemed a bit too much, if he was reading things right. And it also made sense, somehow, and made him angrier at the world at large all the same. At least Bel would fucking tell him things, instead of summarily deciding he wasn't the right one and couldn't deal with shit.

Squalo took a deep breath and then let it out slowly, rubbing small circles over his spine.

"Boss has always been the strongest out of all of us," he intoned in a placating tone, though soothing didn't really suit him very much. "And you can't really measure yourself up against some fucked up bullshit Byakuran came up with. There's a reason he makes Boss wary."

Perhaps that last bit was more than he'd ever say, but Xanxus had been downright defensive about Byakuran the first time BREW had brought the bastard aboard. Squalo tried to fill in the blanks and keep Bel from having a breakdown in public. Not so much because he cared what people thought, but because he didn't really think the Prince would deal with the aftermath well enough.

[kirikizamuyo]

Bel's grip on Squalo's waist tightened a bit. Byakuran... It was all his fault. Everything. He figured there's a few things Boss probably didn't tell Squalo. He tried to keep his voice as level as he could as he spoke.

"He has every reason to be. Byakuran... All of the acrobaleno are dead. He killed them all. Released waves into the air that paralyzed and hurt their bodies... Not even they were strong enough to stand up to him. He killed all of them, and took what pacifiers he could get his hands on..." Bel's body started shaking, almost violently as his voice dropped into a whisper. Still, he tried to contain himself.

"Mammon too... But he didn't go out like the others... Stupid baby... He killed himself... Colonello died in front of him, protecting him from what the reports said... And that stupid greedy baby killed himself so the bastard they were up against wouldn't get the pleasure of it..." Bel had to stop to keep his breathing under control. It had been a couple years since he'd lost himself like this... Not since the realization of Mammon's death had actually hit him.

[requiem_no_ame]

"And now the bastard's here," Squalo's voice had hardened like a diamond, "waltzing about and we can only wait."

He pulled Bel with him as he stepped out of the path, away from the flow of people and hopefully, any prying eyes. He knew what Mammon meant to Bel. He could only imagine what his death would do to the Prince and the aftermath of it. He fingered the hair at the nape of Bel's neck.

"It's not your fault."

[kirikizamuyo]

Bel allowed Squalo to lead him out of the public eye without any complaints, his grip only tightening slightly. If Squalo paid enough attention, he might notice a spot on his shoulder where' Bel's face was buried getting a little bit wet.

"...I was pathetic. I couldn't accept it. Months... It might have been a year... I was in denial. I told everyone he would come back... Mammon can't die... Just like he didn't die in the battle with Mukuro over the rings... Just made it look like he had in order to escape... I was running from the truth... Everyone pitied me... I hated it. I HATED seeing them look at me like that... It wasn't fair... A prince isn't supposed to be weak..."

[requiem_no_ame]

This was new. This was weird and awkward and new. Belphegor didn't cry. Belphegor, fucking Prince the Ripper didn't fucking cry.

Except he was, and Squalo was having a not so small panic attack in the sudden silence of his mind, because he was so not ready to deal with something like this. He wasn't comforting material. He didn't do comforting. And Bel never cried. He went fucking batshit insane about things and tried to kill someone, but he never cried.

Well, he was right now, and as Squalo breathed deeply, trying to center himself, he figured he'd never been ready to deal with any of the shit he usually dealt with. He could deal with this.

He hoped.

"A Prince is allowed his grief," Squalo kept the words quiet, focusing on the problem at hand - namely, making Bel stop crying - and stepping hard on the urge to run. "It's his godly given right."

These days, it was getting harder and harder to not run.

[kirikizamuyo]

Not only could Bel sense Squalo's want to help him, but he could also pick up on the part that was probably freaking the fuck out right about now. Bel didn't blame him. No one had seen him cry after Mammon. He had locked himself in his room for an entire week straight to make sure of that. Luckily for Squalo, Bel was good at pulling himself together. He was a prince after all.

He changed position just slightly, enough to rest his chin over the opposite shoulder he had his face buried into moments before. When he spoke, his voice was level once more, as if he had once again accepted what he couldn't change. "The shock from realizing Mammon was never coming back, somehow, made me cry when it first hit me. That was the first time in my entire life that I could even remember. I didn't let anyone see me. I was locked in my own room for a week until I finally got myself together."

He gave a sigh, relaxed a bit more, trying to show Squalo he was mostly okay now. "As much as I'm loyal to Boss and respect him... I'm glad you're here. Seems every time I talk to him he brings up Rasiel for some reason or another."

Yes, because diverting the conversation away from Mammon was always a good idea.