Video

[fortressmommy]

[Helga is pacing back and forth, she's agitated and the lack of communication from her friends is getting to her. She's pretty sure they must be here somewhere, she just hasn't found them yet.]

Criminey! What's a girl got ta do to get some contact here people? Pheebs if you're here let me know kay! C'mon Pheebs I know I said leave me alone and all

Comments

[video]

[fortressmommy]

[Helga stares at the face on the video, a bar tender...oh well I guess it takes all kinds.]

Yes literally, there's literally a boy with a football for a head wandering around Hillwood.

[Pause. Something filters in from a previous conversation.]

I'm gonna guess you're not from around here blondie.

Re: [video]

[fortressmommy]

...I know I'm not in Hillwood. Hillwood doesn't have a freaky moon.

[Is this guy hooked on smoothies too? Helga is wary of meeting anyone like Miriam again.]

Who are you anyway Bucko?

Re: [video]

[fortressmommy]

[Great, just great, freaky suns, freaky moons. Is anything in this place normal?]

Helga. Helga Pataki. You a bar tender or something?

Re: [video]

[fortressmommy]

[Woop de frikken do. She's in Oz without the flying monkeys and midgets.]

So if I asked you to mix me up something you'd have to do it. Anything in the world, even if it had weird things in it?

[Being a bar monkey seems like a crappy job, Helga doesn't take orders from anyone.]

Re: [video]

[fortressmommy]

[Curiosity makes Helga take a good look around his apartment, or what she can see from the communicator screen. Nope, no bar. But that didn't stop Miriam. No blender either. Maybe this guy is just naturally slow.]

I could be really young lookin'.

Okay then blondie, lets say hypothetically I'm like thirty-two and I go into the bar and I say make me up a drink with a beetle in it and some toilet water and pork rinds. Would ya do it?

Re: [video]

[fortressmommy]

[Some bar tender he is.]

What happened to the customer is always right Bucko?

Re: [video]

[fortressmommy]

[Fine, ruin all my fun.]

BORING!

Re: [video]

[fortressmommy]

[Helga is tempted to poke him in the head or steal his sunglasses, that would get a reaction, but she can't it's a video feed...damn video feeds.]

I'm nine ya doughnut hole of course I got no taste.