A string of bad events..
I must say last week.. especially Fri on was really the start of the worst there was ever to come..I've never cried so many buckets of tears as i have done..
It started with my laptop crashing on me on Friday evening..i thought i had lost every data on it.. it's the entire sales team's d-base that i've got on it... i was panic stricken.. anyway.. its back now and working of it now.. and its working fine so far...
Then a client asking for a contract to be sent to her ASAP as she was leaving the country that very night and will only be back in early November. And she did not want to miss the deadline.. So i thought fine i can still work off my computer at home.. then i realised my connection had been cut off cos my dad never passed me the bill to pay for the phone line! arrrgggh at this point i was arguing with him.. he was accusing me of being negligent and i told him off to not expect me to go through mail that did not belong to me.. he used to just place the bill on my table and i would just pay it.. why did he stop doing that? Did the bill now weigh a tonne for him to do even that?! I was just a raving lunatic at this point.. i was upset with him not at just this... but everything abt him..i was upset that he had so much time for other people and drinking but not for us and just this little job.. i just felt it was all so unfair.. so happened meltdown no.1...
Then on the same day.. things went wrong at a surprise birthday party i was organising... the caterers screwed up.. did not bring food warmers and skirtings! What sort of caterers would do that?! guests were streaming in and food was not up.. and the person we were going to surprise was already on her way back! - we scrambled.. i was too unhappy abt this and did not want to foot the bill.. so i said i'll deal with them the next day..
So the next day i was in for such a rude shock when i spoke to the owner of the catering co who insisted he did nothing wrong and i was unneccessarily kicking up a fuss.. because in the end i got everything i needed.. IN THE END.. which was already 630 when they said they were delivering the food at 530 (but they showed up at 540 with not everything!).. i had to ring my cousin to stall his wife...she was starting to suspect because it was getting real odd.. after weeks and weeks of preparation i was so worried this was just going to go down the drain..so the owner of catering company said he is refusing to deal with me and screamed at me if i wanted to pay i could if i did not want to pay i could too and if i wanted to deal with him again i could and if i did not its fine too... and slammed the phone down on me! My jaw was left open.. i was shocked beyond words at the treatment i just received... the beginnings of meltdown no.2
Then a couple of hrs after that i tried to clean iqbal's room... in particular i wanted to clear a duffel bag that had been sitting in a corner for a whole year that is filled with clothes that have not been washed and filled with sand.. how gross is that?! but it seems to iqbal i was doing the biggest sin ever and got told off what a messed up person i am and how messed up my life is and he continued to rattle of how he hated the words tha came out of my mouth everytime.. and he just could not stand me and just wants to slap me everytime i say something.. he just kept repeating the word how much he wanted to slap me so much with so much hatred.. i could not take it.. i ran to my room.. and then began meltdown no.2...
After the weekend.. i just felt completely zapped of all my energy.. and i just slept like there was no tomorrow..
I've just decided this.. i dont think i need to talk to iqbal anymore.. because if someone does not know how to appreciate or respect me.. they dont deserve my attn.. i understand that i did nothing wrong... some people just like to be clean and for some it doesnt bother them.. i fall in the first category.. and if its so hard to understand that too bad.. maybe we just cant understand each other..
It's fine if i never get a word of thank you but i know i did not deserve to be told off like that.. the words stung so bad.. that even now as i recall the whole event..i feel like crying again..i could not stop replaying the whole event on sun and yesterday.. think am better now..
I dont think i should talk to him either.. abt how i feel.. its of no use.. he always thinks he is right... and i'm the irritant or the stupid one.. or the selfish one..
well... it looks like 3 bad things happened in a row.. so i hope that was the end.. and what's to come now will only be good... Hopefully...
It started with my laptop crashing on me on Friday evening..i thought i had lost every data on it.. it's the entire sales team's d-base that i've got on it... i was panic stricken.. anyway.. its back now and working of it now.. and its working fine so far...
Then a client asking for a contract to be sent to her ASAP as she was leaving the country that very night and will only be back in early November. And she did not want to miss the deadline.. So i thought fine i can still work off my computer at home.. then i realised my connection had been cut off cos my dad never passed me the bill to pay for the phone line! arrrgggh at this point i was arguing with him.. he was accusing me of being negligent and i told him off to not expect me to go through mail that did not belong to me.. he used to just place the bill on my table and i would just pay it.. why did he stop doing that? Did the bill now weigh a tonne for him to do even that?! I was just a raving lunatic at this point.. i was upset with him not at just this... but everything abt him..i was upset that he had so much time for other people and drinking but not for us and just this little job.. i just felt it was all so unfair.. so happened meltdown no.1...
Then on the same day.. things went wrong at a surprise birthday party i was organising... the caterers screwed up.. did not bring food warmers and skirtings! What sort of caterers would do that?! guests were streaming in and food was not up.. and the person we were going to surprise was already on her way back! - we scrambled.. i was too unhappy abt this and did not want to foot the bill.. so i said i'll deal with them the next day..
So the next day i was in for such a rude shock when i spoke to the owner of the catering co who insisted he did nothing wrong and i was unneccessarily kicking up a fuss.. because in the end i got everything i needed.. IN THE END.. which was already 630 when they said they were delivering the food at 530 (but they showed up at 540 with not everything!).. i had to ring my cousin to stall his wife...she was starting to suspect because it was getting real odd.. after weeks and weeks of preparation i was so worried this was just going to go down the drain..so the owner of catering company said he is refusing to deal with me and screamed at me if i wanted to pay i could if i did not want to pay i could too and if i wanted to deal with him again i could and if i did not its fine too... and slammed the phone down on me! My jaw was left open.. i was shocked beyond words at the treatment i just received... the beginnings of meltdown no.2
Then a couple of hrs after that i tried to clean iqbal's room... in particular i wanted to clear a duffel bag that had been sitting in a corner for a whole year that is filled with clothes that have not been washed and filled with sand.. how gross is that?! but it seems to iqbal i was doing the biggest sin ever and got told off what a messed up person i am and how messed up my life is and he continued to rattle of how he hated the words tha came out of my mouth everytime.. and he just could not stand me and just wants to slap me everytime i say something.. he just kept repeating the word how much he wanted to slap me so much with so much hatred.. i could not take it.. i ran to my room.. and then began meltdown no.2...
After the weekend.. i just felt completely zapped of all my energy.. and i just slept like there was no tomorrow..
I've just decided this.. i dont think i need to talk to iqbal anymore.. because if someone does not know how to appreciate or respect me.. they dont deserve my attn.. i understand that i did nothing wrong... some people just like to be clean and for some it doesnt bother them.. i fall in the first category.. and if its so hard to understand that too bad.. maybe we just cant understand each other..
It's fine if i never get a word of thank you but i know i did not deserve to be told off like that.. the words stung so bad.. that even now as i recall the whole event..i feel like crying again..i could not stop replaying the whole event on sun and yesterday.. think am better now..
I dont think i should talk to him either.. abt how i feel.. its of no use.. he always thinks he is right... and i'm the irritant or the stupid one.. or the selfish one..
well... it looks like 3 bad things happened in a row.. so i hope that was the end.. and what's to come now will only be good... Hopefully...