a new year :)
I don't think this year could have started off any better. I'm not even sure how or why things turned out the way they did but all I care about is that I'm happy. And from now on my happiness will be my first priority when making decisions. I conquer.
So since i've been MIA on LJ I guess i'll fill y'all in on my latest happenings..
I told Jeff I'm done with him. After after having a conversation before he went to Cuba, about how we want to have sex, I decided after he left that I didn't want that at all. I guess I was in one of my stupid and irrational moods where I think I can do things that I can't. So I basically told him that he couldn't give me what I want. I said I was looking for a relationship where I could rely on someone to be there all the time, and he couldn't give that to me. I also said that he should have told me from the beginning that he didn't want a relationship with me, rather than making it blatantly obvious that all he was looking for was a good time. He said it sucked that I had already made up my mind about it all, and that he was planning on calling me that night so he could see me. I thought that was bullshit, and couldn't understand why I was soo obsessed with this vision of him being perfect for me when he really reeeally isn't. So that's that... we hardly talk anymore and he's acting bummed out, when I know he could care less because I didn't mean much to him at all.
And now, a week later, I have a boyfriend. And I'm pretty sure he's not going anywhere in two weeks.
I totally thought that all the persistance on his part in the beginning was going to turn me off totally and make me regret showing any interest. But that never happened. We would go out and he didn't try anything at all. I said I wanted to do things slowly, so he decided to let me call all the shots. One thing led to another and I decided that he's a completely different person than he was in highschool, talking about things I'd heard about him that weren't true.
I still can't really believe I decided to let things start between us, but for some reason I trust everything he's said and know that he won't leave me high and dry like all the others have. There's no questions that aren't answered and I feel completely comfortable asking anything I want. Even if it makes him or I umcomfortable, because no matter what he'll answer honestly. I think I've missed that comfortable stage with a guy, because I haven't had it in over two years, and for some reason we sort of skipped it. There's something about being able to do stupid things like burp in a guy's face and him still wanting to kiss you after. hahaahha.
And speak of the devil he just called me to say hi. And to prove a point that he's trying to learn how to talk on the phone, since he hates doing it.
Anyways.. there's a little update for all of my LJ fans. Mainly wes, since I know he misses reading about me ;)
Thank GOD it's almost friday. I need a break from routine, even though the break just ended. SIIIIGH.
time for class.
So since i've been MIA on LJ I guess i'll fill y'all in on my latest happenings..
I told Jeff I'm done with him. After after having a conversation before he went to Cuba, about how we want to have sex, I decided after he left that I didn't want that at all. I guess I was in one of my stupid and irrational moods where I think I can do things that I can't. So I basically told him that he couldn't give me what I want. I said I was looking for a relationship where I could rely on someone to be there all the time, and he couldn't give that to me. I also said that he should have told me from the beginning that he didn't want a relationship with me, rather than making it blatantly obvious that all he was looking for was a good time. He said it sucked that I had already made up my mind about it all, and that he was planning on calling me that night so he could see me. I thought that was bullshit, and couldn't understand why I was soo obsessed with this vision of him being perfect for me when he really reeeally isn't. So that's that... we hardly talk anymore and he's acting bummed out, when I know he could care less because I didn't mean much to him at all.
And now, a week later, I have a boyfriend. And I'm pretty sure he's not going anywhere in two weeks.
I totally thought that all the persistance on his part in the beginning was going to turn me off totally and make me regret showing any interest. But that never happened. We would go out and he didn't try anything at all. I said I wanted to do things slowly, so he decided to let me call all the shots. One thing led to another and I decided that he's a completely different person than he was in highschool, talking about things I'd heard about him that weren't true.
I still can't really believe I decided to let things start between us, but for some reason I trust everything he's said and know that he won't leave me high and dry like all the others have. There's no questions that aren't answered and I feel completely comfortable asking anything I want. Even if it makes him or I umcomfortable, because no matter what he'll answer honestly. I think I've missed that comfortable stage with a guy, because I haven't had it in over two years, and for some reason we sort of skipped it. There's something about being able to do stupid things like burp in a guy's face and him still wanting to kiss you after. hahaahha.
And speak of the devil he just called me to say hi. And to prove a point that he's trying to learn how to talk on the phone, since he hates doing it.
Anyways.. there's a little update for all of my LJ fans. Mainly wes, since I know he misses reading about me ;)
Thank GOD it's almost friday. I need a break from routine, even though the break just ended. SIIIIGH.
time for class.