Private Journal (Letter 1)
Right, so I guess this is the next best thing to having you here mate. I've got a bit of a problem. Seems I've buggered up the works again and don't have time to take a breather from it. Apparently I was snogging Remus before I showed up here. Snogging him and then left him. Not unusual for me, I know, but this is Remus. Our best mate. I'd never do anything to hurt him and we both know that.
The thing is, when I showed up a few days ago and was acting like a right old git like I normally do, he started snogging me. I'm not going to say I didn't like it. The boy's a good snogger, and, well, I seem to swing a bit that way. Not that I've told you that or anything. Without any time to let things sink in your bird gets on my case. I had reasons for checking out the jungle. If you were here you'd understand. I needed to make sure it was safe for Padfoot and Moony. We can go a decent way in, but Padfoot'll have to keep Moony from getting too far in. I got pretty scraped up when I tried and barely got through one part with my arse in tact.
Thing is, I don't know what to think about all this. Padfoot's always been close with Moony. Even I've wondered about it. But Remus and I ... I've never thought about it. He's too good a guy for me to taint like that. I love him, but I never thought about it like that. I doubt he'd even let me entertain the idea now. I hate this concept of competing with myself. It's sick.
Yeah well, what choice have I got, right?
Sirius