Retrospect
I've learned a lot about myself this year on the whole.
1.) I am a misanthrope
2.) I am a friendship terrorist
3.) I don't care for affection, really.
4.) I truly enjoy being by myself and I'd rather do things alone when others might want company
5.) In the beginning of the year when I got annoyed with people in this country, I felt bad because I came here for a few reasons- one reason was to learn about this culture. But I did learn about it. And I don't like it. And that's okay because I'm allowed to and I don't give a shit what anyone else thinks. I was open minded when I came here and I still am open minded. But I was highly unimpressed. The country itself is beautiful but the people living in it need some work. And the way they do things is just fucked. Not all of them, but a lot of them. I refuse to pretend like all British are jolly, giving, smart, and overall better than Americans because that's what you're supposed to think about your host country when studying abroad.
I will end this rant here, but I will gladly share any of my opinions about England and its citizens whenever I want because I can.
6.) I might act too mature sometimes (according to a few 18 year old boys that I live with) and need to work on it. I admit that, but that doesn't mean my male flatmates aren't annoying and worthless, because they think we are their Mommies. (We= the girls in our flat.)
Maybe when I get home I'll go back to being the crazy little rebel that I used to be....just for the hell of it. I'm not really sure what made me settle down in the first place.
7.) I will never, ever, ever live in a dorm like residence again. Ever.
and
8.) No matter how many times I've swore to myself I would never let it happen, and no matter how much I try to deny it, or how much I try to fight it........I am slowly turning into my Mom.
Overall this year has been incredible. Looking back at the first day here, I was frightened, lost, culture shocked, didn't know a soul in this entire country, and was convinced I wouldn't get to do any of the things I wanted here because it would be too hard or I wasn't ready for it.
Before I came here I had never booked my own flight and hostel reservation in another country, let alone ridden a city bus or translated an underground metro map.....or gone bar hopping until 6 AM and then hit up a local chippy for breakfast, or traveled around through 9 different countries in a month with one backpack, fell asleep on a train and realized I completely missed my stop and had no idea where I was, or driven a friend's car on the left side of the road with the steering wheel on the right (and nearly crashed it), lived off of tins of soup and tuna for a week because I spent too much money in the pub and couldn't afford groceries.
Basically a lot of the stuff I learned this year was how to take care of myself on my own, that it's okay to take chances and I might be wrong sometimes. And knowing if there is something that needs to be done or taken care of, nobody is going to hold my hand and do it for me anymore.
And if I'm lost or I can't figure something out, I ask someone. I used to HATE approaching random people when I needed help.
I think I used to be more of a follower and now I am definitely a leader.
The most important people I met this year were all of my flatmates- whom I've learned from, cried with, randomly gotten naked with for no apparent reason, gotten very wasted with, tried new drugs with, relied and depended on, hated, loved, worried about, yelled at, fought with, ran all over this town with till the sun came up, went on a rampage with and smashed some shit on purpose just to let out frustration, committed minor crimes with, laughed until I couldn't breathe, and had about a billion memories that I'm gonna think about 10 or 20 years from now. I don't know what it's gonna be like when I leave here and I may never come back but hopefully I taught them a lot of things this year too.
I have some mixed emotions about leaving on Sunday. I can't wait to see my family though. I haven't even heard their voices in the last 6 months. I feel like i've missed out on a lot back home. I just can't wait to get back and get my summer started.
I might write some more on this later...I can't really be bothered....
The end kind of?
1.) I am a misanthrope
2.) I am a friendship terrorist
3.) I don't care for affection, really.
4.) I truly enjoy being by myself and I'd rather do things alone when others might want company
5.) In the beginning of the year when I got annoyed with people in this country, I felt bad because I came here for a few reasons- one reason was to learn about this culture. But I did learn about it. And I don't like it. And that's okay because I'm allowed to and I don't give a shit what anyone else thinks. I was open minded when I came here and I still am open minded. But I was highly unimpressed. The country itself is beautiful but the people living in it need some work. And the way they do things is just fucked. Not all of them, but a lot of them. I refuse to pretend like all British are jolly, giving, smart, and overall better than Americans because that's what you're supposed to think about your host country when studying abroad.
I will end this rant here, but I will gladly share any of my opinions about England and its citizens whenever I want because I can.
6.) I might act too mature sometimes (according to a few 18 year old boys that I live with) and need to work on it. I admit that, but that doesn't mean my male flatmates aren't annoying and worthless, because they think we are their Mommies. (We= the girls in our flat.)
Maybe when I get home I'll go back to being the crazy little rebel that I used to be....just for the hell of it. I'm not really sure what made me settle down in the first place.
7.) I will never, ever, ever live in a dorm like residence again. Ever.
and
8.) No matter how many times I've swore to myself I would never let it happen, and no matter how much I try to deny it, or how much I try to fight it........I am slowly turning into my Mom.
Overall this year has been incredible. Looking back at the first day here, I was frightened, lost, culture shocked, didn't know a soul in this entire country, and was convinced I wouldn't get to do any of the things I wanted here because it would be too hard or I wasn't ready for it.
Before I came here I had never booked my own flight and hostel reservation in another country, let alone ridden a city bus or translated an underground metro map.....or gone bar hopping until 6 AM and then hit up a local chippy for breakfast, or traveled around through 9 different countries in a month with one backpack, fell asleep on a train and realized I completely missed my stop and had no idea where I was, or driven a friend's car on the left side of the road with the steering wheel on the right (and nearly crashed it), lived off of tins of soup and tuna for a week because I spent too much money in the pub and couldn't afford groceries.
Basically a lot of the stuff I learned this year was how to take care of myself on my own, that it's okay to take chances and I might be wrong sometimes. And knowing if there is something that needs to be done or taken care of, nobody is going to hold my hand and do it for me anymore.
And if I'm lost or I can't figure something out, I ask someone. I used to HATE approaching random people when I needed help.
I think I used to be more of a follower and now I am definitely a leader.
The most important people I met this year were all of my flatmates- whom I've learned from, cried with, randomly gotten naked with for no apparent reason, gotten very wasted with, tried new drugs with, relied and depended on, hated, loved, worried about, yelled at, fought with, ran all over this town with till the sun came up, went on a rampage with and smashed some shit on purpose just to let out frustration, committed minor crimes with, laughed until I couldn't breathe, and had about a billion memories that I'm gonna think about 10 or 20 years from now. I don't know what it's gonna be like when I leave here and I may never come back but hopefully I taught them a lot of things this year too.
I have some mixed emotions about leaving on Sunday. I can't wait to see my family though. I haven't even heard their voices in the last 6 months. I feel like i've missed out on a lot back home. I just can't wait to get back and get my summer started.
I might write some more on this later...I can't really be bothered....
The end kind of?