6 months in a nutshell.
I have been neglecting my journal a lot lately, although I log in to livejournal every day so I can keep up to date with my friend's list. I'm still here! Even though I don't post. Wow, my last post was January 19th! That's insane.
It's hard for me to sum up the last 6 months! It's flown by. This post is probably going to be all over the place!
We had to put our oldest dog Hope down in April. The house has been so empty without her, and I miss her so much every day. She lost the use of her back legs, and could barely get around or use the bathroom properly. She was in a lot of pain. We tried everything we could; medication, exercises for her legs, and even building her a doggy wheelchair, but nothing worked. We eventually had to come to terms with the fact that she was tired, and didn't have the joy in life she once had. I didn't want her to suffer anymore. It was one of the hardest decisions I ever had to make, and I still cry a lot about it, but I think it was for the best. She's not in pain anymore. Our friend Mark is a vet tech, so he was able to come and euthanize her at home. I didn't want her to be scared at the vet. This way she just went to sleep in our arms as she laid on the couch one last time.
I have become increasingly worried about my health. I've had heart palpitations for the last few years. I had an ECG when I lived back in New Brunswick and it was normal, because I couldn't really have the palpitations on command or anything, so nothing really showed up. I went to the doctor in May and had another ECG and Holter monitor, but the results for that were normal as well. I only had 2 extra heart beats in the 24 hours I was monitored, which the doctor said was better than the average person. I've been pretty exhausting to live with over the past few months because I think that every bump, burp and scratch is going to kill me. How can I not be scared when perfectly healthy people are dropping dead! I started Weight Watchers on May 14 and it's been going well. It really puts things in perspective on how much I used to eat. I think this is something I can stick with. I just need to increase the activity portion of it. I've been taking a couple of walks but I was kind of derailed by my incident in June.
I was admitted to the hospital from June 3rd-6th. I was bit by a dog on the ankle while I was in the back room of the vet clinic on June 1st (by one of the dogs that lives there). I ended up with 2 pretty deep puncture wounds. I spent hours waiting and bleeding in the ER while my foot/ankle/leg started to swell. I was not impressed with the patient care that day. I was seen by the doctor and by then I was screaming in pain, but she said just to clean it, put polysporin on it and bandage it up. She made me put my own polysporin and band-aids on while I was at the hospital. So angry. I did not get antibiotics because she said sometimes dog bites get infected, but sometimes not. Two days later redness started running up my leg and I was in an extreme amount of pain, to the point that I couldn't really walk and was getting around the house transferring from computer chair to computer chair. I went to the ER on June 3rd and the on call doctor said I needed to be admitted because I had pretty serious cellulitus (tissue infection). I was absolutely terrified. I am deathly afraid of hospitals, especially the one in Meadow Lake since their basic patient care is terrible. I screamed and I cried and thought I was going to die and Kathy had to hold me down. I was put on IV antibiotics and blood thinners (since my mom had a history of blood clots). I had some pretty low times in the hospital. Lots of crying in the room by myself. Visiting hours didn't last nearly long enough. It made me realize that hospitals aren't a great environment for your emotional health. The food was also terrible, and when I cried when I received my first meal...it was just so terrible! There were some fantastic nurses who were looking after me, although I didn't get off to the best start with one of them when she was joking about calling home and letting them know when I was "fading away". Not something you want to say to someone who has an insane fear of dying!! I really admire my mother, and all of the other nurses I know, because it's definitely not an easy job, especially when you have to put up with patients like me!
I have been doing a lot of thinking lately and realizing who my real friends are, and distancing myself away from those who aren't. I miss the times when friendships weren't so goddamned complicated. I've been feeling kind of worthless to a couple of people, which is not how friends are supposed to make you feel, but it's basically been said that we were only friends because they didn't know anyone else, but now that they've got their own friends, we no longer serve a purpose. Nice eh? It's very reminiscent of high school, which is something that I do not want to revisit. I have a handful of really great friends that I'd do anything for, and I'm sure they'd do anything for me too. I have been saying it for awhile, but life is much too short to be putting up with that kind of bullshit. I know who my friends are, and I love them with all my heart, and I will always be there for them, no matter what.
I bought a new camera with my income tax return. A Fujifilm FinePix S1500. It is the nicest camera I've ever owned, and I've taken a renewed interest in photography. I've been inspired a lot by Jenna. She was an awesome photographer, and I want to continue her legacy. Every time I take a picture I feel her with me. I've gotten some great shots that I am proud of, but I owe it to her. I have been going out almost every day looking for interesting things to photograph. It's been really fun. Kathy says I have an eye for photography. I tell her I have two!
Jeff and I are planning another trip home, possibly in September. I want to take our time though. In 2006 we drove home, but didn't stop and see anything around us. It was a waste because I let this beautiful country just pass me by. I barely took any pictures then, either. Mind you we had a crappy 35mm camera, but we were just so focused from getting from Point A (Meadow Lake, SK) to Point B (Miramichi, NB), that we didn't just stop and look around anywhere for any great length of time. This time around I want to go slow, plan the trip a bit better, but leave some wiggle room for adventure. I had originally wanted to take the whole month of September to travel the country but I'm not sure if it's possible, considering our responsibilities at home. I need this trip though. This time around I will definitely be taking pictures.
2009 is the year of MUSIC! I am planning to go to the Ness Creek Music festival this month, and the Regina Folk Fest in August. I went to see TV on the Radio in concert on May 29th, which was great. I also saw Bif Naked on June 19th. It was the best concert of my life. I brought her bananas! Bif follows the Raw food diet and has a hard time finding things to eat on tour, so she as been surviving off of bananas. I wasn't able to give them to her before the concert since no one answered the door to the tour bus, so I brought them in with me. I got so much grief from other people at the concert for having bananas; people asked if I was going to throw them at Bif, a lot of people laughed at me, and some people told me to put my bananas away, but I shrugged them off. I gave Bif the bananas after her second song and she was so happy! She held them up in the air and showed them off to the crowd. She thanked me twice, once after she got them, and the second time when she lft the stage before the encore. The concert was amazing. I was being shoved against the stage and she was really concerned and told me to let her know if they were giving me any trouble. She let me sing into the mic 5 times, and rubbed my shoulder when I was getting distressed after being shoved around really bad....she's amazing. I had bruises on both my knees from being shoved against the stage but it was worth it! (I'd like to think the Banana in the picture was one from the bunch I gave her!)
I'm still doing lots of fostering for the Humane Society. So far this year I've fostered 14 puppies. I currently have 6 puppies and 1 "wild" white husky. The puppies were orphaned when they were 10 days old. Their mom was involved in a bite incident (likely protecting her puppies!) and was shot by the RCMP without the proper 10 days quarantine for rabies observation. Their eyes were still closed and they had to be bottle fed for weeks, but they are now 7 weeks old and thriving. It's been an absolute joy to raise these puppies!
The "wild" husky was rescued over the Victoria Day long weekend in May. There were five 6 month old huskies abandoned 50km South of Meadow Lake (in the middle of nowhere!). It took us the whole weekend but we only managed to rescue two of them. One of the pups was hit by a vehicle, and the other two are still out there. We managed to catch one with a dog trap borrowed by the town, but someone called the RCMP about a dog in a cage and they went out and let it go, so we've been unable to catch the last two. May has been coming along in her socialization. She wouldn't even let us touch her when she first arrived, but now she'll let us pet her, and jumps up on our bed, and enjoys being around people. She still has a long way to go, but I'm unsure if she'll ever be socialized enough to be adopted. It's taken her this long to trust us, I can only imagine how long it will take her to trust someone completely new. She's going to need a very understanding home.
That's about all I can think of to post right now. Who knows how long it will take me to update again. I am on Facebook all the time, so for those of you who don't have me on your list, feel free to ADD ME!
And don't forget...Always take time to stop and appreciate the people and the world around you. Seize the day, and make each day an adventure!
It's hard for me to sum up the last 6 months! It's flown by. This post is probably going to be all over the place!
We had to put our oldest dog Hope down in April. The house has been so empty without her, and I miss her so much every day. She lost the use of her back legs, and could barely get around or use the bathroom properly. She was in a lot of pain. We tried everything we could; medication, exercises for her legs, and even building her a doggy wheelchair, but nothing worked. We eventually had to come to terms with the fact that she was tired, and didn't have the joy in life she once had. I didn't want her to suffer anymore. It was one of the hardest decisions I ever had to make, and I still cry a lot about it, but I think it was for the best. She's not in pain anymore. Our friend Mark is a vet tech, so he was able to come and euthanize her at home. I didn't want her to be scared at the vet. This way she just went to sleep in our arms as she laid on the couch one last time.
I have become increasingly worried about my health. I've had heart palpitations for the last few years. I had an ECG when I lived back in New Brunswick and it was normal, because I couldn't really have the palpitations on command or anything, so nothing really showed up. I went to the doctor in May and had another ECG and Holter monitor, but the results for that were normal as well. I only had 2 extra heart beats in the 24 hours I was monitored, which the doctor said was better than the average person. I've been pretty exhausting to live with over the past few months because I think that every bump, burp and scratch is going to kill me. How can I not be scared when perfectly healthy people are dropping dead! I started Weight Watchers on May 14 and it's been going well. It really puts things in perspective on how much I used to eat. I think this is something I can stick with. I just need to increase the activity portion of it. I've been taking a couple of walks but I was kind of derailed by my incident in June.
I was admitted to the hospital from June 3rd-6th. I was bit by a dog on the ankle while I was in the back room of the vet clinic on June 1st (by one of the dogs that lives there). I ended up with 2 pretty deep puncture wounds. I spent hours waiting and bleeding in the ER while my foot/ankle/leg started to swell. I was not impressed with the patient care that day. I was seen by the doctor and by then I was screaming in pain, but she said just to clean it, put polysporin on it and bandage it up. She made me put my own polysporin and band-aids on while I was at the hospital. So angry. I did not get antibiotics because she said sometimes dog bites get infected, but sometimes not. Two days later redness started running up my leg and I was in an extreme amount of pain, to the point that I couldn't really walk and was getting around the house transferring from computer chair to computer chair. I went to the ER on June 3rd and the on call doctor said I needed to be admitted because I had pretty serious cellulitus (tissue infection). I was absolutely terrified. I am deathly afraid of hospitals, especially the one in Meadow Lake since their basic patient care is terrible. I screamed and I cried and thought I was going to die and Kathy had to hold me down. I was put on IV antibiotics and blood thinners (since my mom had a history of blood clots). I had some pretty low times in the hospital. Lots of crying in the room by myself. Visiting hours didn't last nearly long enough. It made me realize that hospitals aren't a great environment for your emotional health. The food was also terrible, and when I cried when I received my first meal...it was just so terrible! There were some fantastic nurses who were looking after me, although I didn't get off to the best start with one of them when she was joking about calling home and letting them know when I was "fading away". Not something you want to say to someone who has an insane fear of dying!! I really admire my mother, and all of the other nurses I know, because it's definitely not an easy job, especially when you have to put up with patients like me!
I have been doing a lot of thinking lately and realizing who my real friends are, and distancing myself away from those who aren't. I miss the times when friendships weren't so goddamned complicated. I've been feeling kind of worthless to a couple of people, which is not how friends are supposed to make you feel, but it's basically been said that we were only friends because they didn't know anyone else, but now that they've got their own friends, we no longer serve a purpose. Nice eh? It's very reminiscent of high school, which is something that I do not want to revisit. I have a handful of really great friends that I'd do anything for, and I'm sure they'd do anything for me too. I have been saying it for awhile, but life is much too short to be putting up with that kind of bullshit. I know who my friends are, and I love them with all my heart, and I will always be there for them, no matter what.
I bought a new camera with my income tax return. A Fujifilm FinePix S1500. It is the nicest camera I've ever owned, and I've taken a renewed interest in photography. I've been inspired a lot by Jenna. She was an awesome photographer, and I want to continue her legacy. Every time I take a picture I feel her with me. I've gotten some great shots that I am proud of, but I owe it to her. I have been going out almost every day looking for interesting things to photograph. It's been really fun. Kathy says I have an eye for photography. I tell her I have two!
Jeff and I are planning another trip home, possibly in September. I want to take our time though. In 2006 we drove home, but didn't stop and see anything around us. It was a waste because I let this beautiful country just pass me by. I barely took any pictures then, either. Mind you we had a crappy 35mm camera, but we were just so focused from getting from Point A (Meadow Lake, SK) to Point B (Miramichi, NB), that we didn't just stop and look around anywhere for any great length of time. This time around I want to go slow, plan the trip a bit better, but leave some wiggle room for adventure. I had originally wanted to take the whole month of September to travel the country but I'm not sure if it's possible, considering our responsibilities at home. I need this trip though. This time around I will definitely be taking pictures.
2009 is the year of MUSIC! I am planning to go to the Ness Creek Music festival this month, and the Regina Folk Fest in August. I went to see TV on the Radio in concert on May 29th, which was great. I also saw Bif Naked on June 19th. It was the best concert of my life. I brought her bananas! Bif follows the Raw food diet and has a hard time finding things to eat on tour, so she as been surviving off of bananas. I wasn't able to give them to her before the concert since no one answered the door to the tour bus, so I brought them in with me. I got so much grief from other people at the concert for having bananas; people asked if I was going to throw them at Bif, a lot of people laughed at me, and some people told me to put my bananas away, but I shrugged them off. I gave Bif the bananas after her second song and she was so happy! She held them up in the air and showed them off to the crowd. She thanked me twice, once after she got them, and the second time when she lft the stage before the encore. The concert was amazing. I was being shoved against the stage and she was really concerned and told me to let her know if they were giving me any trouble. She let me sing into the mic 5 times, and rubbed my shoulder when I was getting distressed after being shoved around really bad....she's amazing. I had bruises on both my knees from being shoved against the stage but it was worth it! (I'd like to think the Banana in the picture was one from the bunch I gave her!)
I'm still doing lots of fostering for the Humane Society. So far this year I've fostered 14 puppies. I currently have 6 puppies and 1 "wild" white husky. The puppies were orphaned when they were 10 days old. Their mom was involved in a bite incident (likely protecting her puppies!) and was shot by the RCMP without the proper 10 days quarantine for rabies observation. Their eyes were still closed and they had to be bottle fed for weeks, but they are now 7 weeks old and thriving. It's been an absolute joy to raise these puppies!
The "wild" husky was rescued over the Victoria Day long weekend in May. There were five 6 month old huskies abandoned 50km South of Meadow Lake (in the middle of nowhere!). It took us the whole weekend but we only managed to rescue two of them. One of the pups was hit by a vehicle, and the other two are still out there. We managed to catch one with a dog trap borrowed by the town, but someone called the RCMP about a dog in a cage and they went out and let it go, so we've been unable to catch the last two. May has been coming along in her socialization. She wouldn't even let us touch her when she first arrived, but now she'll let us pet her, and jumps up on our bed, and enjoys being around people. She still has a long way to go, but I'm unsure if she'll ever be socialized enough to be adopted. It's taken her this long to trust us, I can only imagine how long it will take her to trust someone completely new. She's going to need a very understanding home.
That's about all I can think of to post right now. Who knows how long it will take me to update again. I am on Facebook all the time, so for those of you who don't have me on your list, feel free to ADD ME!
And don't forget...Always take time to stop and appreciate the people and the world around you. Seize the day, and make each day an adventure!
