Really? it's been that long?
I need to vent...and I need to do it right now.
I work for a wonderful lawyer, who is full of charisma and strength. She's smart and strong and capable; she's never here which is hard as she runs a horse farm as well, but frankly that's okay with me. Recently I was promoted to work for another senior lawyer here. He's not a partner but not a junior and he's wonderful! I love working for him more than I thought possible. I also work for a VERY senior silent partner here. He's been practicing law for over 50 years, and even though he is also very rarely around nor does he give me much work, he's a pleasure to see and talk to and in general just an excellent person.
Except...my boss. Claire. The first one. She's got no filter. The profanities that come out of that woman! And it's LOUD and boisterous when she's here - and it makes it so hard to work. Moreover, with all the responsibilities that I now have and in taking over the senior associate's position as his previous assistant was quite literally useless, I've made a few mistakes. Not massive ones but ones that has caused Claire to blast me in ways that I don't think I've ever encountered. She all but called me an idiot last week and it's now spilled into this week. I had a meeting with HR which ended up solving nothing because I sat there and was told that I have to slow down, be more careful with her work, that they know I am taking what Claire has said "personally" and that I feel "hurt" but that I have to let it go...how on EARTH am I to let it go? It's a constant barrage of attack when she's in a mood! Today alone she came in the office and forcefully screamed the word "Fuck" as loud as she could because of the printer not working, and several times at that....
Maybe it is from working for Annette but let me tell you I rarely use those words at HOME let alone at our office! And the personal attack? It isn't easy to be transferred into a spot where the previous assistant (who is still employed here might I add!) has left TWO YEARS of filing, myriad of dismissals that should have been sent months ago, and a whole host of things I am SURE that I haven't encountered yet. Admittedly, I could have done many things better...I am not going to say I am perfect but the transition has been horrible.
Then I get home to our new apartment that we moved into, and the red neck losers upstairs? they parked in front of our driveway AGAIN so we can't get in. I am not going to retiterate everything that has happened over the last five months living there because honestly this post would be eighteen pages long, but the audacity of those people! After conning Gregory to leave their Rogers Cable/Internet box in OUR apartment, kept us awake AGAIN until 2 a.m. Friday refusing to answer the door when we pounded on it telling them to shut the party down, and now this? let's not throw down that we have about ten people living there now on any given day because for some reason they feel opening the garage door right beside MY car and having a little party with all their friends is actually appropriate.
Adding to the frustration of trying desperately to trust Gregory again after all he's done...spending on that money on drugs...I am SICK of combing through his bank account because he's spent his money and trying to figure out whether it was in opiates, or whether he just spent it. GAWD I am sick of it. I am tired of having to babysit the man that I love...Sunday we had our good friends from Toronto down for the night, was playing Whoville Monopoly (being probably the most fun evening shy of the day before when we were at a pool party for my cousin's 7th birthday), and what does he do? get HAMMERED at the table, throw a two year old fit because he lost the game and was ahead, and then actually did a stomping fit to the store...and in the morning he had to work even though it was a holiday...let me tell you? the immature little boy attitude...I told him I've had ENOUGH. I am sick of taking care of him, his responsibilities, his immaturity.
I feel like I am being punished. I met a man who loves me so deeply, would take a bullet THEN jump in front of a train to ensure my safety, yet he lied RIGHT to my face over an addiction that we could have fixed a long time ago if he'd just opened his mouth and told me, and he acts like he's freaking two years old when it suits him!
In short. My home. My job. And my relationship. Are making me eat more, find positivity less, and I am exhausted.
I have to create this dinner for Greg, his brother, his brother's wife, his sister, and her boyfriend next Friday. I started this event to make Greg happy because all he wants is for his brother to see he's on his way too (which is how I figured out that the reason he acts out like a child is because growing up his entire family put so much effort into ensuring Pat got over his learning disability, seeing him to college, that the only way Greg got attention was to be an angry boy) which I think is a little childish, but I get it. And honestly after how those people have treated us...I just want to say "screw it" and cancel. I know I can't but I want to.
When is it going to be about me? I don't care that that is a selfish statement. When is it that I get to have something out of everything? I still pay all the bills but now I HAVE to because of the literal THOUSANDS Greg has spent in drugs, I still can't seem to get my license back thanks to the above, I don't get any recognition from his family what so ever even though for over two years I've had his back, supported him, helped him get to his promotion, got him going in life...I can't seem to get one little niceity from work even though out of the 20plus employees that are here, only four of us assistants actually do the work and mostly it's ME that covers...When do I get the reward?
My fingers hurt. I cleaved into them with a large knife while cutting an avocado. It rolled, nuff said.
Back to work.
I work for a wonderful lawyer, who is full of charisma and strength. She's smart and strong and capable; she's never here which is hard as she runs a horse farm as well, but frankly that's okay with me. Recently I was promoted to work for another senior lawyer here. He's not a partner but not a junior and he's wonderful! I love working for him more than I thought possible. I also work for a VERY senior silent partner here. He's been practicing law for over 50 years, and even though he is also very rarely around nor does he give me much work, he's a pleasure to see and talk to and in general just an excellent person.
Except...my boss. Claire. The first one. She's got no filter. The profanities that come out of that woman! And it's LOUD and boisterous when she's here - and it makes it so hard to work. Moreover, with all the responsibilities that I now have and in taking over the senior associate's position as his previous assistant was quite literally useless, I've made a few mistakes. Not massive ones but ones that has caused Claire to blast me in ways that I don't think I've ever encountered. She all but called me an idiot last week and it's now spilled into this week. I had a meeting with HR which ended up solving nothing because I sat there and was told that I have to slow down, be more careful with her work, that they know I am taking what Claire has said "personally" and that I feel "hurt" but that I have to let it go...how on EARTH am I to let it go? It's a constant barrage of attack when she's in a mood! Today alone she came in the office and forcefully screamed the word "Fuck" as loud as she could because of the printer not working, and several times at that....
Maybe it is from working for Annette but let me tell you I rarely use those words at HOME let alone at our office! And the personal attack? It isn't easy to be transferred into a spot where the previous assistant (who is still employed here might I add!) has left TWO YEARS of filing, myriad of dismissals that should have been sent months ago, and a whole host of things I am SURE that I haven't encountered yet. Admittedly, I could have done many things better...I am not going to say I am perfect but the transition has been horrible.
Then I get home to our new apartment that we moved into, and the red neck losers upstairs? they parked in front of our driveway AGAIN so we can't get in. I am not going to retiterate everything that has happened over the last five months living there because honestly this post would be eighteen pages long, but the audacity of those people! After conning Gregory to leave their Rogers Cable/Internet box in OUR apartment, kept us awake AGAIN until 2 a.m. Friday refusing to answer the door when we pounded on it telling them to shut the party down, and now this? let's not throw down that we have about ten people living there now on any given day because for some reason they feel opening the garage door right beside MY car and having a little party with all their friends is actually appropriate.
Adding to the frustration of trying desperately to trust Gregory again after all he's done...spending on that money on drugs...I am SICK of combing through his bank account because he's spent his money and trying to figure out whether it was in opiates, or whether he just spent it. GAWD I am sick of it. I am tired of having to babysit the man that I love...Sunday we had our good friends from Toronto down for the night, was playing Whoville Monopoly (being probably the most fun evening shy of the day before when we were at a pool party for my cousin's 7th birthday), and what does he do? get HAMMERED at the table, throw a two year old fit because he lost the game and was ahead, and then actually did a stomping fit to the store...and in the morning he had to work even though it was a holiday...let me tell you? the immature little boy attitude...I told him I've had ENOUGH. I am sick of taking care of him, his responsibilities, his immaturity.
I feel like I am being punished. I met a man who loves me so deeply, would take a bullet THEN jump in front of a train to ensure my safety, yet he lied RIGHT to my face over an addiction that we could have fixed a long time ago if he'd just opened his mouth and told me, and he acts like he's freaking two years old when it suits him!
In short. My home. My job. And my relationship. Are making me eat more, find positivity less, and I am exhausted.
I have to create this dinner for Greg, his brother, his brother's wife, his sister, and her boyfriend next Friday. I started this event to make Greg happy because all he wants is for his brother to see he's on his way too (which is how I figured out that the reason he acts out like a child is because growing up his entire family put so much effort into ensuring Pat got over his learning disability, seeing him to college, that the only way Greg got attention was to be an angry boy) which I think is a little childish, but I get it. And honestly after how those people have treated us...I just want to say "screw it" and cancel. I know I can't but I want to.
When is it going to be about me? I don't care that that is a selfish statement. When is it that I get to have something out of everything? I still pay all the bills but now I HAVE to because of the literal THOUSANDS Greg has spent in drugs, I still can't seem to get my license back thanks to the above, I don't get any recognition from his family what so ever even though for over two years I've had his back, supported him, helped him get to his promotion, got him going in life...I can't seem to get one little niceity from work even though out of the 20plus employees that are here, only four of us assistants actually do the work and mostly it's ME that covers...When do I get the reward?
My fingers hurt. I cleaved into them with a large knife while cutting an avocado. It rolled, nuff said.
Back to work.