(no subject)
still not sure the apology post I made on zecky was the right thing. Lost one friend so far because of it. Sure, maybe it was the right thing to do, but I still feel like shit because I had to be the one to give in. I feel bad because I'm the one who had to say everything was my fault, and nothing was anybody elses fault. I have to take responsibility for everything that has ever happened....and nothing is anybody elses fault. It's bad enough I feel responsible for Steven's death, but why does EVERYTHING here have to be my fault, when I know deep down, not everything is? Granted, I know a lot of things are my fault, but I still have to take the blame for everything. And I don't like it.
Anyways, this feels really weird having a new lj. I've had the other one since october of last year, when they were still doing invites and Ang gave me an invite *thanks Ang :)* It seems like everyone else I knew was getting a new lj like every other week. And I was happy to stay with mine for the time being. But now I feel the right thing is to leave the other one behind and just start anew. Which I think is a good idea. I can leave all the mean and angry posts, hurtful comments, posts I regretted later, behind now. So...yeah...it's a good thing :)
Anyways, this feels really weird having a new lj. I've had the other one since october of last year, when they were still doing invites and Ang gave me an invite *thanks Ang :)* It seems like everyone else I knew was getting a new lj like every other week. And I was happy to stay with mine for the time being. But now I feel the right thing is to leave the other one behind and just start anew. Which I think is a good idea. I can leave all the mean and angry posts, hurtful comments, posts I regretted later, behind now. So...yeah...it's a good thing :)