Really tough
It's not that I'm getting pushed around by subordinates, its just that I'm taking things a little easier.. I admit I'm not good at making everybody else follow me, but it could have been also because I'm much much younger than everybody else. I'm not letting them lead me or order me when it should have been the other way around, its just that I'd like to give them chance to make things right.
Now that.. is a very lame excuse. LOL.. I admit that I was never the outspoken type.. which might be the reason why I'm being pushed around when in fact.. I should be the one in command. What happened today and what I have read today finally knocked some senses into my currently empty head. Hooray! I finally realized that "so what if they're older? it will always be my decision which they have to follow.." in fact, if I always let them have their way.. the blame will always be on me in the end.
Starting tomorrow, I will no longer be the nice little "Ms Ran" who always nods and smiles for every mistake that they have done. From now on, there can only be two feelings towards me, either they'll love me or hate me. Period.
Ugh I hate this.. but if its for the better.. I'll do it. In this world.. little miss nice girl cannot survive. If I want to make things better, I'd have to be the tough type. I'll be strict, I'll be hard, and if need be, I'll be the war freak type. Sorry guys, you yourselves asked for this. You had all the chances you can get..
*sigh*
and all the things happening lately were not helping me become a better person.. lolz sad but true..
Back in college, we all believed that we shouldn't be absorbed within this system.. that we had all the means and knowledge to change it.. All those speeches about being a "scholar ng bayan" and being different from everybody else, cream of the crop.. and all superlatives that ever existed.. lol added sparkles to my starry eyes..
now I think all the sparkles are gone.. :( my starry eyes are now gone.. (now replaced with puffy round black eyebags, and deep eyes - yes I'm supposed to look like a ghost from a low budget bad horror movie)
watchamacallthis? "the mid life crisis?"
Now that.. is a very lame excuse. LOL.. I admit that I was never the outspoken type.. which might be the reason why I'm being pushed around when in fact.. I should be the one in command. What happened today and what I have read today finally knocked some senses into my currently empty head. Hooray! I finally realized that "so what if they're older? it will always be my decision which they have to follow.." in fact, if I always let them have their way.. the blame will always be on me in the end.
Starting tomorrow, I will no longer be the nice little "Ms Ran" who always nods and smiles for every mistake that they have done. From now on, there can only be two feelings towards me, either they'll love me or hate me. Period.
Ugh I hate this.. but if its for the better.. I'll do it. In this world.. little miss nice girl cannot survive. If I want to make things better, I'd have to be the tough type. I'll be strict, I'll be hard, and if need be, I'll be the war freak type. Sorry guys, you yourselves asked for this. You had all the chances you can get..
*sigh*
and all the things happening lately were not helping me become a better person.. lolz sad but true..
Back in college, we all believed that we shouldn't be absorbed within this system.. that we had all the means and knowledge to change it.. All those speeches about being a "scholar ng bayan" and being different from everybody else, cream of the crop.. and all superlatives that ever existed.. lol added sparkles to my starry eyes..
now I think all the sparkles are gone.. :( my starry eyes are now gone.. (now replaced with puffy round black eyebags, and deep eyes - yes I'm supposed to look like a ghost from a low budget bad horror movie)
watchamacallthis? "the mid life crisis?"