01 - [Combined Written/Voice]
[Written/Voice]
[A feminine voice with a posh British accent comes over the voice system, reading aloud in a too-bright tone.]
Dearest diary,
Today we went down to the lake of hellfire and dunked each other until our skin melted off. Sisyphus waved to us on our way back to the cabins, silly man, and ended up crushed under that dratted boulder again!
Tonight, if we're good, we get to roast the souls of dead babies over the flames of the tombs of the Heretics and Epicureans. Doesn't that sound delightful? Personally I hope we get to go visit the devil and go ice skating this week. We made a splendid game out of avoiding being devoured. Whoever keeps from getting their intestines torn out wins.
[End written, voice continues dryly.]
And hear I thought Hell angled more towards torturing accursed souls and twisting humans into bestial shadows of their former selves, not boring its tenants to death. Oh, I'm sorry, that would be boring them to damnation, wouldn't it.
Honestly, is this some unoriginal demonic twist on Chinese water torture? Anyone out there? Care to shut me up?
The bitch doesn't have courtesy enough to come to my own funeral and then locks me away in a room with my cat of all things. Am I supposed to fear for its life? We're a bit beyond that, I should think.
[Silence, a sigh, and the transmission clicks off.]
[A feminine voice with a posh British accent comes over the voice system, reading aloud in a too-bright tone.]
Dearest diary,
Today we went down to the lake of hellfire and dunked each other until our skin melted off. Sisyphus waved to us on our way back to the cabins, silly man, and ended up crushed under that dratted boulder again!
Tonight, if we're good, we get to roast the souls of dead babies over the flames of the tombs of the Heretics and Epicureans. Doesn't that sound delightful? Personally I hope we get to go visit the devil and go ice skating this week. We made a splendid game out of avoiding being devoured. Whoever keeps from getting their intestines torn out wins.
[End written, voice continues dryly.]
And hear I thought Hell angled more towards torturing accursed souls and twisting humans into bestial shadows of their former selves, not boring its tenants to death. Oh, I'm sorry, that would be boring them to damnation, wouldn't it.
Honestly, is this some unoriginal demonic twist on Chinese water torture? Anyone out there? Care to shut me up?
The bitch doesn't have courtesy enough to come to my own funeral and then locks me away in a room with my cat of all things. Am I supposed to fear for its life? We're a bit beyond that, I should think.
[Silence, a sigh, and the transmission clicks off.]