Asshole
Sometimes I think I might be an asshole. I don't want to be, but maybe I am, you know?
So far in life I haven't managed to do much of anything. The one major accomplishment I managed to achieve I fucked up and lost. It makes staying positive hard as fuck. I look at myself as a failure most of the time, and even when I'm not it's just because I managed to distract myself with something else. I'm a fucking mess, but I never show it. I don't want to talk about it, and I don't know what to do at the same time. I use to have someone to talk to about these sorts of things, but not anymore.
FUCK
I feel lost, lost, lost. I just have to figure everything out for myself though, and hopefully not make the same mistakes I've made already again. There is no one that can help me, and there is nothing anyone can do for me. I don't even think there is really any advice I can be given, because I'm just stubborn anyway. I just have to let time do it's thing with me, and set goals, and move forward. I have lots to work on though, thats the tough part. I feel like I'm soooo behind in life, in many aspects. Social, Love, Work, School, Future. I need to work on making these things better and doing better.
Can I do it?
Here we are
Isn't life bizarre?
It likes to take from us and throw it out
We'll carry on
What's done is done
Yeah, we'll do without it somehow
The world is gone, don't think about it
Cuz life is short we'll do without it
They say the road is long, don't think about it
Cuz life is short we'll do without it
We can move on forward
Don't worry
The best we've known is yet to come
We can move on forward
Don't worry
The worst won't get the best of us
Some memories, a crippling
Don't let the disease bring us down
There's nothing else to know
Just let it go
Yeah, we'll do without it somehow
The world is gone, don't think about it
Cuz life is short we'll do without it
They say the road is long, don't think about it
Cuz life is short we'll do without it
We can move on forward
Don't worry
The best we've known is yet to come
We can move on forward
Don't worry
The worst won't get the best of us
The world is gone, don't think about it
Cuz life is short we'll do without it
We'll do without it
We'll do without it
We'll do without it
We'll do without it
Go
We can move on forward
Don't worry
The best we've known is yet to come
We can move on forward
Don't worry
Don't you worry
Though the world is gone
We'll carry on
We'll do without it
We'll do without it
Can I move on? Can I do without it? What drives me to feel this way? Am I right, or just fucking wrong? Can she be right, is it really not that special?
I think the answer to all of these is no right now, but that can change, right?
I know you can grow out of love, but I really never wanted to do that. I love too much, and it's fucking HARD to let that love go. I feel like I'm losing myself really, or at least a BIG part of me and my life. I mean, all of the big shit in my life, all of the growing and changing, she was there. Now? Gone, just like that, and I don't have a say in any of it, at least not anymore. Nope, sorry, you were wrong, we don't work, bye, have a nice life, I don't love you anymore. Eh, THAT shit isn't right. I guess it never is though. I mean, I know I'm not the first to ever go through this, but I never thought I would. I bet everyone thinks that though.
Life is hard, and it only seems to get harder.
This isn't going to be easy, and I have to change to adapt. I don't want to change, I like who I am, the me thats in love and happy, but now I'm just me, no attachments. Thats fucking scary. I don't trust myself enough to get through the tough times without that someone there. I thought I was set, that I knew who that someone was, but now it's going to have to be someone else, and until then, me.
I am not ready for another someone for a long time, so it's just me from here on out.
I read something, one of those birthday books, and it said about Jan 5th people (Me and Jimmy Paige), that we move on easily. We feel emotions strongly, but we can move on easily. It's like we understand how important the emotions are, and fully relish that, but can manage to move on from them someone. I don't know about that. BUT, it also said that we have a tendency to get comfortable in a relationship, and we have to try hard not to do that and ruin things. Well, I don't believe in the whole astrology bullshit, but that is/was true of me. I got too fucking comfortable. You live and learn though, so now I'll know better.
I'm done. Sorry for the long post and wasting your precious friend page space. I know you didn't read this, so don't even PRETEND you did.
THE END
So far in life I haven't managed to do much of anything. The one major accomplishment I managed to achieve I fucked up and lost. It makes staying positive hard as fuck. I look at myself as a failure most of the time, and even when I'm not it's just because I managed to distract myself with something else. I'm a fucking mess, but I never show it. I don't want to talk about it, and I don't know what to do at the same time. I use to have someone to talk to about these sorts of things, but not anymore.
FUCK
I feel lost, lost, lost. I just have to figure everything out for myself though, and hopefully not make the same mistakes I've made already again. There is no one that can help me, and there is nothing anyone can do for me. I don't even think there is really any advice I can be given, because I'm just stubborn anyway. I just have to let time do it's thing with me, and set goals, and move forward. I have lots to work on though, thats the tough part. I feel like I'm soooo behind in life, in many aspects. Social, Love, Work, School, Future. I need to work on making these things better and doing better.
Can I do it?
Here we are
Isn't life bizarre?
It likes to take from us and throw it out
We'll carry on
What's done is done
Yeah, we'll do without it somehow
The world is gone, don't think about it
Cuz life is short we'll do without it
They say the road is long, don't think about it
Cuz life is short we'll do without it
We can move on forward
Don't worry
The best we've known is yet to come
We can move on forward
Don't worry
The worst won't get the best of us
Some memories, a crippling
Don't let the disease bring us down
There's nothing else to know
Just let it go
Yeah, we'll do without it somehow
The world is gone, don't think about it
Cuz life is short we'll do without it
They say the road is long, don't think about it
Cuz life is short we'll do without it
We can move on forward
Don't worry
The best we've known is yet to come
We can move on forward
Don't worry
The worst won't get the best of us
The world is gone, don't think about it
Cuz life is short we'll do without it
We'll do without it
We'll do without it
We'll do without it
We'll do without it
Go
We can move on forward
Don't worry
The best we've known is yet to come
We can move on forward
Don't worry
Don't you worry
Though the world is gone
We'll carry on
We'll do without it
We'll do without it
Can I move on? Can I do without it? What drives me to feel this way? Am I right, or just fucking wrong? Can she be right, is it really not that special?
I think the answer to all of these is no right now, but that can change, right?
I know you can grow out of love, but I really never wanted to do that. I love too much, and it's fucking HARD to let that love go. I feel like I'm losing myself really, or at least a BIG part of me and my life. I mean, all of the big shit in my life, all of the growing and changing, she was there. Now? Gone, just like that, and I don't have a say in any of it, at least not anymore. Nope, sorry, you were wrong, we don't work, bye, have a nice life, I don't love you anymore. Eh, THAT shit isn't right. I guess it never is though. I mean, I know I'm not the first to ever go through this, but I never thought I would. I bet everyone thinks that though.
Life is hard, and it only seems to get harder.
This isn't going to be easy, and I have to change to adapt. I don't want to change, I like who I am, the me thats in love and happy, but now I'm just me, no attachments. Thats fucking scary. I don't trust myself enough to get through the tough times without that someone there. I thought I was set, that I knew who that someone was, but now it's going to have to be someone else, and until then, me.
I am not ready for another someone for a long time, so it's just me from here on out.
I read something, one of those birthday books, and it said about Jan 5th people (Me and Jimmy Paige), that we move on easily. We feel emotions strongly, but we can move on easily. It's like we understand how important the emotions are, and fully relish that, but can manage to move on from them someone. I don't know about that. BUT, it also said that we have a tendency to get comfortable in a relationship, and we have to try hard not to do that and ruin things. Well, I don't believe in the whole astrology bullshit, but that is/was true of me. I got too fucking comfortable. You live and learn though, so now I'll know better.
I'm done. Sorry for the long post and wasting your precious friend page space. I know you didn't read this, so don't even PRETEND you did.
THE END