(no subject)

[sonicsatellite]

there are moments when i breathe.
but i mean
really breathe.
where
my lungs sting
and my chest numbs
from the coldcuttingair.
like i've been holding my breath
for twenty-four years
and finally i inhale
everything i've missed out on.
for the first time.
and i become addicted to breathing.
and i breathe so hard
until i don't care about exhaust fumes
until the cloud above the la skyline
disappears
&breathe
&breathe
to feel the pain.
and to freeze my lungs.
until it's so fast
i can't keep up
and i pass out.

and i wake up dizzy.
smile.
and wait for the voice
of
the reason
why my lungs still work.