the other day
March 29 11:56 p.m.
Well it is late- it feels really late- I got up rather early this morning- 8 o’clock- they were supposed to turn off the water at 9- they ended up not doing so and I seemingly got up for no reason- but I did get stuff done- I typed my research paper for English- which I needed to do- so it was good that I did get up
I had a dream last night that I was dancing with my dad- we were waltzing- I don’t know how to waltz and I don’t know if my dad even knows how to dance, but we were as graceful as any ballroom dancer would be- I told tiffany about it and she said that that meant that I was about to come to/ or already had come to some resolution with a man- either my father or a family member or just a man in general
Odd that last night I finally started feeling better about the whole zander situation- hmmmm maybe dream interpreters are actually right sometimes- but really, I had a good time hanging out with him, and though it seems like I had to drag it out of him, he finally showed me that he was thinking- he is so confused- only summer will tell, eh? I am sure it will- I am not being sarcastic- really I know that summer will determine things and shed light on many things as well- I hope that he comes out happy- and not confused- I hope that he realizes why he is in the relationship he is in- the strong points of it- if it is worth it-
She asked him to marry her this weekend- jokingly- but I dunno- she then laughed and said that if they were actually to get married he would have to propose- wow- not even fucking twenty- it amazes me
I have been trying to encourage his thinking everything through thoroughly and until yesterday, he showed no signs of actually thinking things through- I am really happy- I really am- and it is not because I think that we will be together someday- I am glad that that is not the reason for my happiness- no, I am happy that he is thinking- I am happy that he is not just going to sit in a stagnant relationship and drown in the muddy waters he wades in, no even knowing how he got there- I think that is it- I guess I do like to encourage people to think- I would like to say that it is what I am best at, but I don’t know if I can claim that yet
Kaelin says that I am the only person he talks to that makes him think- sad, because college is supposed to be about self learning and if it teachers aren’t doing that, then he really is missing out on the college experience- I hope I can help or that he will find more people that promote introspective thought
I am tired- I am going to sleep….i dunno when I will wake up
So much done today
Resolution and then dreams
I am glad that I am getting over it
Not getting over him necessarily, but getting over the situation
The walls that he put up to guard himself from me
Said he wouldn’t have been able to have sex
I don’t know
What’s the saying from Mark, “the spirit is willing but the flesh/body is weak” or something like that
Peace and love
Beautiful dreams
Well it is late- it feels really late- I got up rather early this morning- 8 o’clock- they were supposed to turn off the water at 9- they ended up not doing so and I seemingly got up for no reason- but I did get stuff done- I typed my research paper for English- which I needed to do- so it was good that I did get up
I had a dream last night that I was dancing with my dad- we were waltzing- I don’t know how to waltz and I don’t know if my dad even knows how to dance, but we were as graceful as any ballroom dancer would be- I told tiffany about it and she said that that meant that I was about to come to/ or already had come to some resolution with a man- either my father or a family member or just a man in general
Odd that last night I finally started feeling better about the whole zander situation- hmmmm maybe dream interpreters are actually right sometimes- but really, I had a good time hanging out with him, and though it seems like I had to drag it out of him, he finally showed me that he was thinking- he is so confused- only summer will tell, eh? I am sure it will- I am not being sarcastic- really I know that summer will determine things and shed light on many things as well- I hope that he comes out happy- and not confused- I hope that he realizes why he is in the relationship he is in- the strong points of it- if it is worth it-
She asked him to marry her this weekend- jokingly- but I dunno- she then laughed and said that if they were actually to get married he would have to propose- wow- not even fucking twenty- it amazes me
I have been trying to encourage his thinking everything through thoroughly and until yesterday, he showed no signs of actually thinking things through- I am really happy- I really am- and it is not because I think that we will be together someday- I am glad that that is not the reason for my happiness- no, I am happy that he is thinking- I am happy that he is not just going to sit in a stagnant relationship and drown in the muddy waters he wades in, no even knowing how he got there- I think that is it- I guess I do like to encourage people to think- I would like to say that it is what I am best at, but I don’t know if I can claim that yet
Kaelin says that I am the only person he talks to that makes him think- sad, because college is supposed to be about self learning and if it teachers aren’t doing that, then he really is missing out on the college experience- I hope I can help or that he will find more people that promote introspective thought
I am tired- I am going to sleep….i dunno when I will wake up
So much done today
Resolution and then dreams
I am glad that I am getting over it
Not getting over him necessarily, but getting over the situation
The walls that he put up to guard himself from me
Said he wouldn’t have been able to have sex
I don’t know
What’s the saying from Mark, “the spirit is willing but the flesh/body is weak” or something like that
Peace and love
Beautiful dreams