tell me to shut up already
i am not a clean person. and by that i dont mean hey ive got lots of stds and things of that nature but more like i prefer to throw things in piles because i dont want to waste time putting things away. but there are some times when i just can't take it anymore. the piles build up and i can't stand the crumbs in my bed and on the floor and the shit all over my desk and i start to imgaine this stink spreading over the room and looking at the mess makes me really believe that it smells. so then i clean hardcore. in this crazy ADD way where i start with one thing and then see something else that needs to be taken care of so i move on to that and then come back to the first task. and when i vacuum there's no order to it i just kind of float around the room and try not to run over the cord cuz my dad always told me not to do that. and i play this game with myself, it's a mini game really...vacuuming as far as the cord will stretch until it rips out of the socket.
you're like omg she just wrote a whole fucking paragraph about cleaning. but i think it's this deep symbollic metaphor that describes my life. somehow. or i could just be dumb. plus i'm sitting here alone, feeling sorry for myself but at the same time knowing that its my own damn fault that im alone. and if i really wanted to be with other people i could make an effort. but a bigger part of me likes being alone. with 3 roomates its rare that it will ever happen again, so i feel like i should enjoy it while i can. but it also kinda makes me get all weird...i think too much and i think things that i dont wanna think but i am afraid that they might be reality. plus i'm rambling about fucking cleaning. get me out of here. i wanna go home.
you're like omg she just wrote a whole fucking paragraph about cleaning. but i think it's this deep symbollic metaphor that describes my life. somehow. or i could just be dumb. plus i'm sitting here alone, feeling sorry for myself but at the same time knowing that its my own damn fault that im alone. and if i really wanted to be with other people i could make an effort. but a bigger part of me likes being alone. with 3 roomates its rare that it will ever happen again, so i feel like i should enjoy it while i can. but it also kinda makes me get all weird...i think too much and i think things that i dont wanna think but i am afraid that they might be reality. plus i'm rambling about fucking cleaning. get me out of here. i wanna go home.