needy
I fully acknowledge that I do not have many best friends at school. This point has been something I have tried to work on, but making friends quickly is not a strong suit or something I am comfortable with in any respect (betcha didn't know that).
The flip side of that is when said friends decide to get a life, or otherwise disappear my livelihood diminishes after a period of being by myself when for the majority of time I am by myself anyway (but during those points it voluntary and thus "okay"). Then, to compensate, I end up clinging to them desperately and "lashing out" at their absence. Really, I just miss them terribly and, when possible (which coincidentally is really only meal times and the little free time I have)I want to see them or atleast be in the same room while doing different tasks.
This practice, that I have recently come to recognize,is not a healthy one. I fully intend to try to fix it, because I bet for those people it sucks. I mean, atleast I recognize it- so atleast that is a positive. I just felt the need to "confess" my sins- I blame it on the Catholic guilt I was raised on.
On another note, my schedule is working out perfectly. I am going to class on time, and I am completely my homework in a timely manner. My night time ritual is consistent and my bedtime is one that allows me to get plenty of sleep so I don't kill people in the morning. Overall with this aside, things are going pretty good on the school front.
The flip side of that is when said friends decide to get a life, or otherwise disappear my livelihood diminishes after a period of being by myself when for the majority of time I am by myself anyway (but during those points it voluntary and thus "okay"). Then, to compensate, I end up clinging to them desperately and "lashing out" at their absence. Really, I just miss them terribly and, when possible (which coincidentally is really only meal times and the little free time I have)I want to see them or atleast be in the same room while doing different tasks.
This practice, that I have recently come to recognize,is not a healthy one. I fully intend to try to fix it, because I bet for those people it sucks. I mean, atleast I recognize it- so atleast that is a positive. I just felt the need to "confess" my sins- I blame it on the Catholic guilt I was raised on.
On another note, my schedule is working out perfectly. I am going to class on time, and I am completely my homework in a timely manner. My night time ritual is consistent and my bedtime is one that allows me to get plenty of sleep so I don't kill people in the morning. Overall with this aside, things are going pretty good on the school front.