*smiles*
2008 was, particularly in the first half of the year, pretty shite. My vomiting phobia went into overdrive. I'd spend my time indoors worrying about being sick, and anytime I went out I'd be worried about picking something up. I spent a *lot* of the time feeling sick, purely anxiety based, but there was no way to shift it. After a bad side effect with anti-depressants I spent most mornings waking up in a panic. I got to the point where I couldn't eat or drink out, I'd worry about picking things up from people and as a result I lost a friend. Through this friend I lost another friend, someone who I betrayed in a way that still shames me and as a songwriter I should have known better. I'm still not proud of what I did but people fuck up. I know I'm not perfect but I try my damned best to be so I don't hurt myself or anyone else.
Yet despite all that there were some great high points. I got to go to Dublin with my friends for a night out. I added a shite but fixable tattoo to my collection. I got to visit New York for two whole weeks, getting to visit an online friend and getting to see Colin Mochrie and Brad Sherwood from Whose Line Is It Anyway.
And then I got to meet my soulmate. An amazing young beautiful pretty girl who I'm blessed to call mine. I travelled just under 5000 miles to see her in November but there is no-one else in the world I would travel that far just to see. It's the distance that makes it more special and that makes the accent *so* much hotter. I never dreamt I'd get to be with an American girl, let alone someone so special and so well suited. Before I met her I never thought I'd meet my 'soulmate'. I was content settling for someone who I didnt really have that much in common, who I didn't really connect with but got on well enough. But something didn't feel right and I knew there was someone else out there. And boy was I right. Words can never say enough but I feel like the luckiest guy in the world right now. I love her with all my heart and I look forward to the day I can call her my wife. Which incidently, is very much my intention by the end of the year. I'm still waiting for something to go wrong but I'm hoping by the end of the year we'll be on our way to being married and living together in America. This town holds no more for me. I love my parents with all my heart but I cannot stay here and waste away in this town. In this country. So I'm starting a new life and I can't imagine anyone else I'd rather spend it than with Sarah. I look at her and it just fits. She's the missing piece of my lifes puzzle and I love that for once I know I have really found my soulmate. The One. There is so much I want to say about her but I think that can wait for a more structured post like a meme *smiles*
So 2009. I know things aren't going to go exactly to plan but here is what I would love;
To no longer be skinny and to reach my goal of 70kg.
To get a job and pay off my debts.
Visit Sarah for the summer.
Get all the visas sorted so we can have a date for when I can move over, marry Sarah and live with her.
There are other things but I guess those are my main goals. Sarah is hopefully coming over in May and I can't wait to introduce her to my family and friends, show her where I've grown up, do overly British things etc if I can be happy, healthy, living married to Sarah by the end of the year I will know this year has been a success.
I've neglected LJ a lot and I'm hoping to catch up with old friends and make new friends on here.
Much love xxx
Yet despite all that there were some great high points. I got to go to Dublin with my friends for a night out. I added a shite but fixable tattoo to my collection. I got to visit New York for two whole weeks, getting to visit an online friend and getting to see Colin Mochrie and Brad Sherwood from Whose Line Is It Anyway.
And then I got to meet my soulmate. An amazing young beautiful pretty girl who I'm blessed to call mine. I travelled just under 5000 miles to see her in November but there is no-one else in the world I would travel that far just to see. It's the distance that makes it more special and that makes the accent *so* much hotter. I never dreamt I'd get to be with an American girl, let alone someone so special and so well suited. Before I met her I never thought I'd meet my 'soulmate'. I was content settling for someone who I didnt really have that much in common, who I didn't really connect with but got on well enough. But something didn't feel right and I knew there was someone else out there. And boy was I right. Words can never say enough but I feel like the luckiest guy in the world right now. I love her with all my heart and I look forward to the day I can call her my wife. Which incidently, is very much my intention by the end of the year. I'm still waiting for something to go wrong but I'm hoping by the end of the year we'll be on our way to being married and living together in America. This town holds no more for me. I love my parents with all my heart but I cannot stay here and waste away in this town. In this country. So I'm starting a new life and I can't imagine anyone else I'd rather spend it than with Sarah. I look at her and it just fits. She's the missing piece of my lifes puzzle and I love that for once I know I have really found my soulmate. The One. There is so much I want to say about her but I think that can wait for a more structured post like a meme *smiles*
So 2009. I know things aren't going to go exactly to plan but here is what I would love;
To no longer be skinny and to reach my goal of 70kg.
To get a job and pay off my debts.
Visit Sarah for the summer.
Get all the visas sorted so we can have a date for when I can move over, marry Sarah and live with her.
There are other things but I guess those are my main goals. Sarah is hopefully coming over in May and I can't wait to introduce her to my family and friends, show her where I've grown up, do overly British things etc if I can be happy, healthy, living married to Sarah by the end of the year I will know this year has been a success.
I've neglected LJ a lot and I'm hoping to catch up with old friends and make new friends on here.
Much love xxx