amor

[sonatina911]

Don't tell me that you loved me because I'm pretty and I made you feel like someone cared about you. Love is not that impersonal. Maybe those things could be included in a reason, but standing alone, they are not love. First, being loved for the way you look to someone and the way you made them feel is not the same as actually being loved. How long does it take to decide if you think someone looks good or not? Not very long. How much effort do you have to put into knowing how someone makes you feel? Not very much, either, because it's just a reaction. You know automatically if something makes you feel good, so you don't need to spend any time trying to understand it unless you want to. Second, there is nothing that really has to do with me at all in that. It's basically all you. I looked the way you thought someone should and I made you feel a way you wanted to. Not because I was a good person, or you liked some basic characteristic of my personality, or liked making me happy, or anything at all personal. The only thing you noticed about my personality was whatever stuck out enough to make you want to fight with me about it, like having my own opinions. So therefore, you did not love me, you loved some alienated construction of me that was only there for you.

So I guess I've come to the conclusion that love at first sight is basically out of reach for most people. Maybe if you meet someone and right away notice that there is something unexplainable about them that makes you want to understand everything about their life, then you could call that love at first sight. But if you just see someone who you think is beautiful, that's just plain lust. You have to be curious about all dimensions of someone to truly love them, not just the characteristics that you notice right away.