058 + Throw me your matchs, 'cause I like to burn stuff... Give me your lighter to keep me amused!

[somes_auditus]

See, now I know why so many girls are sex-obsessed: it's fun.

Like, you know, I wasn't a virgin before, but I'd never had sex as a female. That was interesting, to say the least.

I'm sore.Anyway, here's a few other things I've noticed in the past few days

Comments

[dark_hierophant]

1. I wholly agree with that idea, there is something crazed about that.

2. There shouldn't be reason to lose one's head. I have no issues with the breasts. It's my wings bothering me.

3. I've never worn heels. I like my boots, though the pair I had already broken in don't fit me right now.

4. What's an underwire?

[somes_auditus]

1. Anyone with sense or a conscious would. As you're neither, it's obviously a very well-known fact.

2. These kids frighten me with their naivety.

3. I recently got a few pairs of boots that I love; I tried on some heels at the store and nearly broke my leg.

4. It's something in a bra to give a little extra lift.

[dark_hierophant]

1. No sense or conscience? Is that what you're accusing me of? Quaint.

2. It's a penis, women, not a viperlisk. It won't bite.

3. I showed up here in my travel boots, but I had a set of riding boots I would hear into combat often with my field plate.

4. I see. And what is a bra?

[somes_auditus]

1. Perhaps.

2. I think it's the moving-around part that freaks them out. I advised tighter-fitting pants.

3. I showed up in sandals. I wore them everywhere. Now I have... a lot of shoes.

4. ....Oh dear. Umm... it's an undergarment women wear to keep their breasts manageable.

[dark_hierophant]

1. Like I said. Quaint. No respect for one's elders these days, that's the problem.

2. Breasts move too! Especially when you're trying to run!

3. I have two pair. One I was going to give to someone else, but now that I am... well, this, they are the only boots that fit me.

4. I see. In my world, women's clothing was designed with a special hem and extra fabric in the lower part of the bust, adjustable by a string tie in order to support the bust.

...I spent ten years as a quartermaster.

[somes_auditus]

1. You can say that again.

2. That's what bras are for.

3. You... think I care?

4. Please refer to no. 3.

Again, refer to no. 3.

[dark_hierophant]

1. Oh? Have you seen your first century yet?

2. They have those for penises, too. It's called a codpiece.

3. Probably not. Did I care about your many shoes? Not especially. It's called making conversation, and apparently it is considered polite to at least make the attempt.

4. See number 3.

...Please note number 3.

Um he's lying on no. 3

[somes_auditus]

1. No, I have not.

2. I don't think I want to know what that is.

3. Where I come from, to make conversation is the highest form of insult.

She isn't.

[dark_hierophant]

1. Indeed.

2. A codpiece is like what you described. There are decorational ones for over the trousers, but they typically go over the undergarment, underneath the trousers. They secure your genitalia and help prevent chafing. They're good for long stints in armor.

3. Where I come from, a smart mouth gets your tongue cut out.

Re: She isn't.

[somes_auditus]

2. Around here, we have what's known as boxers or briefs.

3. Same here. If I see one, I shall inform you immeadiately.

[dark_hierophant]

Child, you can mock to your heart's content, but until you have seen and done a fraction of what I have done, it is but hollow mewlings from a kitten fresh off the teat.

[somes_auditus]

And you, sir, are wasting your bragging. I may not be as old as you, but I have done my fair share in the world. Sheesh; now I know why Vati got so pissed at me before.

[dark_hierophant]

I can accept that. Experience comes with time, that is the problem.

You will eventually reach that. What is your expected lifespan? Are you a half-elf?

[somes_auditus]

Half - ? No. Don't assume everyone is ancient like you. I'm human.

[dark_hierophant]

I am utilizing context.

You look quite young. You speak as one at least a few decades older. I applied deductive reasoning based upon my prior knowledge. You said you had not seen your first century. I assumed you were probably around a half century old based upon your commentary, physical appearance and innuendo in the conversation.

Am I close?

Pure human, eh? Interesting.

[somes_auditus]

..............

My age makes no difference. Experience does. Now, you can rant and rage and throw all kinds of petty insults at me, but you should really think about what you're going up against, before you do so. Mmk, pumpkin?