(no subject)
i want to die.
or i want to throw something.
hard.
i'm so frustrated that i can't even begin to explain how tense i am except that as i was on the phone i desperately wanted to hurl it across the room at the wall. instead all i could do was squeeze it and imagine it crumbling in my hand.
i'm mad, but i don't think i'm even mad at anyone in particular except for myself.
i feel like crying myself to sleep, but it's hard when you share a room with someone.
it's a hard feeling, this aloneness. some would call it solitude, but i call it hell. you would think you wouldn't feel alone knowing that someone out there loves you, but it's far from true.
and every day i'm alone.
or i want to throw something.
hard.
i'm so frustrated that i can't even begin to explain how tense i am except that as i was on the phone i desperately wanted to hurl it across the room at the wall. instead all i could do was squeeze it and imagine it crumbling in my hand.
i'm mad, but i don't think i'm even mad at anyone in particular except for myself.
i feel like crying myself to sleep, but it's hard when you share a room with someone.
it's a hard feeling, this aloneness. some would call it solitude, but i call it hell. you would think you wouldn't feel alone knowing that someone out there loves you, but it's far from true.
and every day i'm alone.