(no subject)

[some_wyrd_chick]

my brain is mush again and there is no knot in this circle
i just keep spinning.
i received motion sickness on a silver platter.
and the reflection burnt my eyes.

i'm trying, really, i am trying.
but seams and hearts on sleeves skip beats
and roll down hills in a mess of numbers and words that
wont
make
sense.

you say things i dont want to remember.
am i really about to jump
or does standing on ledges with only my heels to hold me still count as emotional suicide?
all that was left was running low on page numbers and minutes to grasp at a point where they cared and still pretended they were listening

today i forgot to turn up the corners of my mouth
with the lever
on the right side of my heart.
or was it that
the energy to do so.
lacked.