har har har
The police arrested Patrick Lawrence, a 22-year-old white male, resident of Dacula, GA, in a pumpkin patch at 11:38 p.m. on Friday. Lawrence will be charged with lewd and lascivious behavior, public indecency, and public intoxication at the Gwinnett County courthouse on Monday. The suspect explained that as he was passing a pumpkin patch he decided to stop. You know, a pumpkin is soft and squishy inside, and there was no one around here for miles. At least I thought there wasn't," he stated in a phone interview. Lawrence went on to say that he pulled over to the side of the road, picked out a pumpkin that he felt was appropriate to his purposes, cut a hole in it, and proceeded to satisfy his need. "I guess I was just really into it, you know?" he commented with evident embarrassment. Lawrence apparently failed to notice a Gwinnett County police car approaching and was unaware of his audience until officer Brenda Taylor approached him.
"It was an unusual situation, that's for sure," said officer Taylor.
"I walked up to (Lawrence) and he's...just working away at this pumpkin."
"Excuse me sir," the officer said,
"but do you realize you are screwing a pumpkin?"
"He froze and was clearly very surprised I was there, then looked me straight in the face and said,"
"A pumpkin? Damn...is it midnight already?'"
"It was an unusual situation, that's for sure," said officer Taylor.
"I walked up to (Lawrence) and he's...just working away at this pumpkin."
"Excuse me sir," the officer said,
"but do you realize you are screwing a pumpkin?"
"He froze and was clearly very surprised I was there, then looked me straight in the face and said,"
"A pumpkin? Damn...is it midnight already?'"