"This conversation is awkward..."

Apr 04, 2010 17:57

 So...weird.  It is now story time:

Enji got baptized tonight.  Which is awesome.  Really.  I was surprised by how touching the whole thing was.

Vaughn was there.  Vaughn is the nice roommate who came and ate dinner with us last Sunday, remember (he didn't have a pseudonym at the time)?  Anyway, as I walked past him completely unwittingly, he said hello to me.  I turned and gave him a completely blank stare because I didn't recognize him really at all.  That is to say, I recognized that he looked familiar but I had no idea where I knew him from.  Which has happened to me a lot, especially since I danced in the ward talent show.  People I've never seen in my life come up to me and tell me I did well.  Anyway, I said some sort of vague hello and walked quickly past back to my seat.  About 15 minutes later, as the thing was getting started I saw him talking to Song and realized who he was and why I knew him.  And then I was deeply annoyed that I hadn't recognized him because hello?!  Didn't I decide last week that he is supposed to be my next [first] boyfriend?  How am I supposed to make that happen if, when he says hello to me in such a friendly way, I stare at him blankly?  So, I headed over as soon as it was over to make it clear that I did in fact remember my next boyfriend and explain why I had been so unfriendly before.  Bless him, he was super nice about it, said he felt dumb expecting me to remember who he was after one meeting and that he was impressed I remembered him at all.  Have I mentioned that he's a really nice guy?  I went so far as to tell Song that she should set me up with him...which, if you know Song, is going pretty dang far.  Anyway, I talked to him in a nice friendly manner for about 10 minutes and then we both went our separate ways.

My particular way lay toward the Indoor Practice Field where I was to meet Sergey.  See, towards the end of the baptism I realized that once it was over I had absolutely nothing to do the rest of the night.  So I texted Sergey and, uh, Cristobal, (I can't remember if I've ever given him a pseudonym) on the off chance that one of them would want to do something.  Sergey texted me back right away and said we could hang out after his roommate's game, to which I was also welcome to come.  So, in my skirt, I wandered down to try and find the indoor field.  Due to some bad directions from Sergey, and my own knack for choosing the worst of two possible options, I ended up wandering around in the frigid freezingness that was last night for a good forty minutes.  I was so dang cold when I finally made it in.  But make it in I eventually did.  Just in time for the last few minutes of the game, which they lost.  A few minutes after I arrived we were joined by another girl who is apparently a good friend of the apartment's.  We shall call her Jennifer Aniston.  The four of us (Jennifer, Sergey, myself, and Sergey's roommate Jimmy) all headed back to Sergey's house to decide what we wanted to do with the rest of the night.  This is where I start telling you about the weird weirdness.

Ok, so, as I said, I had texted Sergey and Cristobal.  Well, Sergey replied to me right away, but Cristobal did as well, a little while later.  He responded to my "Hey!  What are you doing tonight?" with a "Oh, you know.  How about you?"  Which bugged me because it wasn't actually an answer.  So I texted him back that I was at my roommate's baptism, but after that I had nothing going on; and did "oh you know" mean that I knew that he was making me cookies?  So, then the baptism ends and I head off to hang out with Sergey.  And we're back to the part where we had just arrived at their house and Cristobal calls me.  We then proceed to have one of the weirdest and most awkward conversations of my life.  Those of you who have ever talked to me in person know that I have an annoying proclivity to recount conversations verbatim and it is a mark of how awkward this one was that I can't even remember what was said exactly.  But essentially, the first 20 minutes of the conversation were divided equally between me getting interrupted by and yelling at Jimmy for being loud and Cristobal telling me some random inane anecdote about going to get a massage from the Chinese people and how he thinks he is beyond their help because he's always so tense.  It was a ridiculously long conversation about nothing.  Then he finally segues into the fact that he hadn't really been planning on making cookies for me tonight and I'm just like "that's fine Cristobal, I was just kidding" and he continues with the fact that he's singing tomorrow and he doesn't think cookies would really be good for his voice and I'm just like "Dude! Let the cookies go!" and then he dithers on and hims and haws and finally he says "Well, pretty much Cordelia (Cordelia being my middle name: Clementine Cordelia) I just don't think that it is a good idea for us to hang out tonight."  At this point, after waiting for a good 25 minutes for him to actually say anything significant, for him to end with this is just like...seriously?  So I'm just like "um...ok" and he then gets all upset and is like "Oh!  Now you sound angry!  Don't be upset!" and I say "I'm not angry Cristobal, it's fine" and he's like "No!  We can hang out, I think.  It's just that I really have to get to bed early and..." and I'm just like "Cris, I don't want to hang out with you if you don't want to, ok?  It's fine.  We don't have to hang out."  and then he get's even more worked up and he's like "nono!  I do want to hang out with you, I really do!  I want to hang out with you dammit!"  At that point I was completely nonplussed.  Where the heck did that come from?  So I just sort of didn't say anything and he's like "Oh! now you're offended.  Shouldn't I have said that?" and I'm just like "Um...it was completely unnecessary and uncharacteristic of you."  So now he's totally flustered and I am completely just weirded out and he says "Dang it, Cordelia, this conversation is going all wrong.  Nothing is coming out the way I wanted it to.  I feel like we need a DTR."  .......?!  The only response I had for that was to burst out laughing, because I assumed that it was a joke.  I mean, what the heck relationship do we even have to define?  Our relationship consists of us seeing each other about every two months.  So at this point I just want to get off the phone so I tell him to go home and figure out what he is doing with his life and then let me know.  So we hang up.  I then set off with Sergey and the gang to the grocery store, during which time we have the following conversation via text: 
Cristobal: "I hope you will forgive me.  You have to remember that I served in England where that word is not offensive.  Sometimes these things happen.  I still need to have that one talk with you by the way"

Me:  "Oh you were serious?  I'm not offended at all.  I've damned things many a time myself.  The only problem is that I don't have a car so you'd have to come get me (I'd walked down to the game from the baptism and then just come with Sergey to his house).  Unless the implication was that we will be talking some other time...

Cristobal:  "I just cooked/ate a steak.  Well, it is quite late now.  I think we should go out for a drink sometime and talk."

ok, my whole "DTR as a joke" theory is sort of negated when he then reaffirms the desire two more times!  What the heck is going on here?  I have discussed this exchange with several people since and we have all come up with two possible options.  Either a.) somehow, after a year of not being interested in me he has suddenly realized that he needs me in his life desperately...not likely.  Or b.) he took my lecture about how he is a self-centered jerk sometimes as a come-on and thinks I need to be disillusioned about his intentions...also not likely.  I have no idea what is going on in his head right now.  I'm so dang confused.  And annoyed at the fact that I am not likely to know what is going on for about an age and a half because that is probably how long it will take him to ever get back to me.

*UPDATE*
So, this was on Friday night.  It is now Sunday and I've been puzzling over this now for almost two days.  So, in an effort to figure out what the heck is going on, I invited him over to watch Conference with us and said we could talk after.  I haven't heard a thing back from him.  Coward.
*ENDUPDATE*

So, that is the end of the weirdness.  The rest of the night was pretty chill.  We ended up watching this really really gay movie called "Armor" or "Armored" or something.  About some guys who drive armored cars who decide they're going to steal their own load.  Really dumb.  The only other significant event of the night was that Jennifer Aniston gave me a ride home and on the way she started telling me all about how confused she is by Jimmy and how she doesn't know what is going on.  I think I must just have a big stamp on my forehead that says "Relationship Coach".  I mean, I'd only known this girl for about 3 hours.  But oh well.  She was pretty cool and she said I should hang out with them all more often when she dropped me off.  I liked her.  Anyway, that is that.  I'm going crazy here, but there's nothing I can do about it.  

seth, confusion, guys, weird, fellas, friends, social outings, random

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