Shedu Maad- Tuesday
Jaina had searched for her parents a while before deciding to check the Falcon. Once she boarded she could hear their voices, and followed them to the cockpit... and stopped as soon as she heard Han say to Leia, "Where did we go wrong?"
Jaina didn't know why she didn't just turn back. Instead she backed away a step in order to hear what she was almost walking in on.
"I don't know," Leia sighed. "I've been trying to figure it out, and I can't."
"Why's he like this? Why isn't Jaina like this?"
Well now Jaina had to listen. She kept out of sight behind the bulkhead, keeping her emotions even so she didn't alert Leia to the fact that she was there.
"They don't have the same experiences," Leia said, "and Jaina's logical enough to know when she's doing the wrong thing."
"And does it anyway," Han cut in.
Hey.
"And does it anyway," Leia agreed. "But Jacen... Jacen seems to think everything he's doing, all the destruction he's causing, is somehow a good thing."
"For who? Him? The rest of the galaxy isn't doing so hot."
There was a silence, and just as Jaina was about to step forward like she hadn't heard anything, Han continued, "Maybe we shouldn't have let him go after the Vong War."
"He was twenty-one, Han," Leia said patiently. "What were we going to do, tell him no?"
"We have to have been able to do something."
"There comes a time when you have to let your kids go and hope you did a good job."
"By the looks of things, we didn't."
There was a brief, heavy pause, and Leia said, "I know."
Listening to this was painful, and Jaina decided she didn't want to hear anymore. They would be okay, and she knew it. But they had spent the majority of their lives trying to save the galaxy, and now their son was destroying it, and it was natural to focus the blame internally. She wanted to jump in and tell them that there might have been nothing they could have done, that the same child they were talking about now had also ended a war and saved lives and why didn't they give themselves credit for that? But one thing she was learning was that everyone had to deal with this in their own way. She could tell them that, and not long ago she would have taken it upon herself to do just that, but it wouldn't stop them from thinking any of it as soon as she was gone. It was something they had to work through, painful as it was.
She slowly backed away from the bulkhead and kept her steps as quiet as possible on the deck as she headed off. She had a feeling they'd be at this for a while.
[NFB/I, OOC is a yay. Based on actual refs in the book, omg.]
Jaina didn't know why she didn't just turn back. Instead she backed away a step in order to hear what she was almost walking in on.
"I don't know," Leia sighed. "I've been trying to figure it out, and I can't."
"Why's he like this? Why isn't Jaina like this?"
Well now Jaina had to listen. She kept out of sight behind the bulkhead, keeping her emotions even so she didn't alert Leia to the fact that she was there.
"They don't have the same experiences," Leia said, "and Jaina's logical enough to know when she's doing the wrong thing."
"And does it anyway," Han cut in.
Hey.
"And does it anyway," Leia agreed. "But Jacen... Jacen seems to think everything he's doing, all the destruction he's causing, is somehow a good thing."
"For who? Him? The rest of the galaxy isn't doing so hot."
There was a silence, and just as Jaina was about to step forward like she hadn't heard anything, Han continued, "Maybe we shouldn't have let him go after the Vong War."
"He was twenty-one, Han," Leia said patiently. "What were we going to do, tell him no?"
"We have to have been able to do something."
"There comes a time when you have to let your kids go and hope you did a good job."
"By the looks of things, we didn't."
There was a brief, heavy pause, and Leia said, "I know."
Listening to this was painful, and Jaina decided she didn't want to hear anymore. They would be okay, and she knew it. But they had spent the majority of their lives trying to save the galaxy, and now their son was destroying it, and it was natural to focus the blame internally. She wanted to jump in and tell them that there might have been nothing they could have done, that the same child they were talking about now had also ended a war and saved lives and why didn't they give themselves credit for that? But one thing she was learning was that everyone had to deal with this in their own way. She could tell them that, and not long ago she would have taken it upon herself to do just that, but it wouldn't stop them from thinking any of it as soon as she was gone. It was something they had to work through, painful as it was.
She slowly backed away from the bulkhead and kept her steps as quiet as possible on the deck as she headed off. She had a feeling they'd be at this for a while.
[NFB/I, OOC is a yay. Based on actual refs in the book, omg.]