(no subject)
***
The pair gazed at each other, an empty corridor. An empty void between them, though they were spaces apart.
"You don't mean that..."
The blonde looked away, and the SOLIDER member put a hand on his shoulder to spin him round, but at the touch Cloud flinched and pushed him off, his voice shuddering. "You're lying Zack, it doesn't make sense why--"
"I just...I just do"
"You're lying"
"I'm not lying"
Cloud had never seen Zack look...was there a word for the look on Zack's face? He wasn't sure, shadows spilled over his face, his eyes hidden in the darkness of the corridor. He looked lost, confused. Nothing Zack was ever remembered for. Cloud found himself hating it but what he said was true, wasn't it? He was afraid to let anyone in, he couldn't--
"Zack--" he began, but always Zack cut him off, Zack was always interrupting...
"We've been friends for a long time Cloud...2 years...that's the longest I've had a real good friend...but...you're more to me than that--always have--I love you..."
Cloud heard him say it again, the words that he couldn't stand to hear, they were commercialized, overrated, pathetic, they could be used offhand, and he knew that Zack was the kind to do so, that and because he just couldn't see how anyone could do so.
"You don't love me Zack; go away...just...leave me alone..."
"Cloud, I know you love me too--"
"NO I DON 'T! LEAVE ME ALONE ZACK! I DON'T LOVE YOU UNDERSTAND, I NEVER HAVE! NOW GO AWAY!"
Cloud's shout echoed in the hallway, loud enough for a lot of the building to hear, tears spilled down his cheeks, Ofcourse everything he said was a lie, how could anyone not love Zack, those eyes, the smile that opened and quietened the roughest of hearts and the childish manner of that of a young boy who had decided never to grow up. How could you turn down someone like him, when he wanted to throw himself at your feet?
Zack stared at him a moment, Cloud didn't notice a change until saw that Zack's arms were shaking.
"Ok...Ok Cloud...I'll go..." he said softly, and he turned to walk down the corridor.
***
Zack turned the corridor, out of sight, he waited until he knew Cloud was gone, his heart was in his throat, braking with every footstep, Zack had been taught as a child not to get over silly things, his dad had said anything but pain to cry over was a silly thing, falling over and crying even then became silly. Zack hadn't cried since he was about 5 years old.
But he was crying now, and he hated himself for it. But he was in pain, he'd been rejected....he was in so much pain, nothing else compared to it. But he had seen the look on Cloud's face had he not, the times they were together, the affection--the close calls on the train--the times when there faces almost touch, 2 years of close calls and incidents--and Cloud had screamed he didn't love him.
Zack found himself wiping his tears, "keep it together..." he murmured to himself, "it's just Cloud...you've coped before this...you..."
No he hadn't. He took a deep breathe and slide down the wall in the corridor and found no shame in it at all, he tried to block Cloud out, but all the smiles and the brightness of his eyes...
"Why do I love you so much...?” Zack sobbed into his hands, "Why can't I have him with me...am I wrong to want that...?"
Zack was not answered, and didn't expect one, finding himself staggering to his room now, and letting the door shut behind him.
^^^ Zack/Cloud Story, PG. First try, very sad I think. Will update properly later.