(no subject)

[solja_of_ruin]

Broken men lead broken lives
a crack in the ankle is a loss from the whole
I'm out of duct tape and glue is scarce
but i try to hold together
everything i regret i do
because pain now comes generic.
nothing is new because nothing is seen
like a sucker punch to the gut
time after time after time again.
the rules were different.
the pain was worse
the path was shady
and every day was worse and worse.
i asked for more chances and i begged for more forgiveness
and everyone always believed.
what was it that stopped u,
what made u care?
i wish my thoughts would leave me alone.
and some times... i wish u were never there.
everyday i saw blood
as a life force pulsing out and dry
it spilled to the ground and burned away
and my body never even moved a hair
my eyes were closed and i saw me there
a man in white with an icy stare.
he told me to do what i could
my mind and body were rare.
i fell to his wants
and i gasped for air
and i sit here as i rot.
i make no sense of my life
and i've lost all sense of sight.
pain dulled but strong.
like a leather cap against an arrow
i've forgotten it all
what was then and before
who? what? when? where? why?
my personal evil die, die die die.
i will send u to hell. even if it takes me being at your side.