Pain and Still in love
Im in so much pain i get up thinking ok can i make it down stairs my self or do i just call mom to bring me more drugs. I had such my clots to the point i passed out cold because it hurt so bad. I guess just being this sick and trying not to think of the pain has made it worse. All i want is him to be here, here with me... No one else but me! But then again why would i ever do that to someone, he might as well find some easy girl that it might work with. I guess ive come to terms im still in love with him. I was talking to one of my friend and the thing is i can see my self with him even tho i know his games. I can tell you every reason to never have anything to do with him but then again i can tell you every great thing.
Then i sit here and know that in less then 2 months i have a chance of someone who made me fall asleep always with a smile on my face to be laying next to... I know that hes only gonna be here for a little while and he might not come at all. I so just wanna call him right now but i cant make my self. I just think ill be bothering him, or maybe he'll be with HER. It sucks to be riden and seeing the line knowing it was almost a year ago... there was just something about him. Then when i was dealing with drama from another dumbfuck he was there for me and i fell even harder for him. Ive never talked that late on the phone with anyone when the next day i had to be at work.
Well its been 6 hours and its not gonna work but i might as well take more... so then atleast im not crying my self to sleep...
Then i sit here and know that in less then 2 months i have a chance of someone who made me fall asleep always with a smile on my face to be laying next to... I know that hes only gonna be here for a little while and he might not come at all. I so just wanna call him right now but i cant make my self. I just think ill be bothering him, or maybe he'll be with HER. It sucks to be riden and seeing the line knowing it was almost a year ago... there was just something about him. Then when i was dealing with drama from another dumbfuck he was there for me and i fell even harder for him. Ive never talked that late on the phone with anyone when the next day i had to be at work.
Well its been 6 hours and its not gonna work but i might as well take more... so then atleast im not crying my self to sleep...