Bloodshot eyes, and the hope for something better
Wasn't planning on writing...but what else am I supposed to do right now?
My last day of high school was Friday...good feeling. Graduation is on Wednesday and then I never have to see any of the people that pretend I'm worthwile again. I fucking hate high school's huge emphasis on social relationships over learning. Education is key in today's society. Either you learn what you can, or you get screwed by America and George Bush gun loving republican types. I think it's unfair that guys and girls alike worry about who they're going to prom with months in advance and find it's the end of the world if they don't go at all. Apathy lurks like a disease and hatred hangs like a cloud over my head when I'm there. I get the feeling that these people were hired to spout lines shine smiles. To ask you about how you did your hair, or if this or that piercing hurt, or what it's like to know kid with mohawks. Sick. My head spins so fast I feel like it'll fall off.
This is something that I wrote about Jeff a long time ago and never posted...
Your eyes are glazed over with a glossy misunderstanding. You watch my mouth move as if you can see the words floating out and into the air where you can't fathom reaching them again. Meaningless expressions. Back to staring at blurry faces and finding infectious fury projected from dry lips. You tell me I'm beautiful. I smile, knowing that sobriety will leave you blank in the morning. Your subconscious contemplating how far intoxication is from love. I don't mind because the scenario is always the same, and no one remembers me beyond a drunken state of simplicity.
...and then something random I decided to throw in...I wrote this about cigarettes a while ago and still find it to be true.
The smoke is beautiful as it billows out of your mouth and dissolves desperately into the night.
I know you'll kill me.
Attempts obvious through coughs
But I can't bear to put you out
Extinguish you in the same fashion that I was suffocated
I can't fathom the thought of smothering out your voice against this concrete.
And I can't leave you alone in this pile of ash and wait for the wind to carry you away.
So I'll breathe you in, until you go peacefully
Knowing you'll never repay the favor.
...yeah call me a hippie..fuck you guys.
My last day of high school was Friday...good feeling. Graduation is on Wednesday and then I never have to see any of the people that pretend I'm worthwile again. I fucking hate high school's huge emphasis on social relationships over learning. Education is key in today's society. Either you learn what you can, or you get screwed by America and George Bush gun loving republican types. I think it's unfair that guys and girls alike worry about who they're going to prom with months in advance and find it's the end of the world if they don't go at all. Apathy lurks like a disease and hatred hangs like a cloud over my head when I'm there. I get the feeling that these people were hired to spout lines shine smiles. To ask you about how you did your hair, or if this or that piercing hurt, or what it's like to know kid with mohawks. Sick. My head spins so fast I feel like it'll fall off.
This is something that I wrote about Jeff a long time ago and never posted...
Your eyes are glazed over with a glossy misunderstanding. You watch my mouth move as if you can see the words floating out and into the air where you can't fathom reaching them again. Meaningless expressions. Back to staring at blurry faces and finding infectious fury projected from dry lips. You tell me I'm beautiful. I smile, knowing that sobriety will leave you blank in the morning. Your subconscious contemplating how far intoxication is from love. I don't mind because the scenario is always the same, and no one remembers me beyond a drunken state of simplicity.
...and then something random I decided to throw in...I wrote this about cigarettes a while ago and still find it to be true.
The smoke is beautiful as it billows out of your mouth and dissolves desperately into the night.
I know you'll kill me.
Attempts obvious through coughs
But I can't bear to put you out
Extinguish you in the same fashion that I was suffocated
I can't fathom the thought of smothering out your voice against this concrete.
And I can't leave you alone in this pile of ash and wait for the wind to carry you away.
So I'll breathe you in, until you go peacefully
Knowing you'll never repay the favor.
...yeah call me a hippie..fuck you guys.