No, I admitted it indeed had some problems, but overall it was good. You were just exaggerating these problems and bashing it because I wrote it. It's not even that long, it's like 6 pages single spaced. Yeah, that's a fucking novel.
Oh, and as much as you want to say that I took too long on my topic because you took half a page on a "much better" topic, that ain't going to fly. Your paper talks about religious hypocrisy. It has some religious guy telling someone to not focus on material possessions, while the religious guy focuses on material possessions. Well, not only is this original and complex, but it also covers a lot of area, and very efficiently proves your point! I'm sure it's a great laugh too. Seriously, that's a pretty simple and overused topic, and it sounds like it covers a very small aspect of religious hypocrisy, without much proving your point or being funny. It could easily have been made into a long story, with developed characters, and tackle all different kinds of religious hypocrisy. It would have been a much better paper, not bad because it's long.
And in the same way, I have a more complicated topic. It develops characters, and deals with a lot more. First I tackle why a lot of stereotypes do in fact suck, by satirizing a lot of stereotypes. This takes a lot of space. Then I tackle why it shouldn't matter, and people should just try and get along. I'm not really satisfied with this part, but it's still a damn good paper overall. I guess when I explained what I was satirizing to you I should have mentioned I was also satirizing teens themselves.
And not to be a nitpicker, but you also don't use ellipses in place of every damn form of punctuation.
Oh, and as much as you want to say that I took too long on my topic because you took half a page on a "much better" topic, that ain't going to fly. Your paper talks about religious hypocrisy. It has some religious guy telling someone to not focus on material possessions, while the religious guy focuses on material possessions. Well, not only is this original and complex, but it also covers a lot of area, and very efficiently proves your point! I'm sure it's a great laugh too. Seriously, that's a pretty simple and overused topic, and it sounds like it covers a very small aspect of religious hypocrisy, without much proving your point or being funny. It could easily have been made into a long story, with developed characters, and tackle all different kinds of religious hypocrisy. It would have been a much better paper, not bad because it's long.
And in the same way, I have a more complicated topic. It develops characters, and deals with a lot more. First I tackle why a lot of stereotypes do in fact suck, by satirizing a lot of stereotypes. This takes a lot of space. Then I tackle why it shouldn't matter, and people should just try and get along. I'm not really satisfied with this part, but it's still a damn good paper overall. I guess when I explained what I was satirizing to you I should have mentioned I was also satirizing teens themselves.
And not to be a nitpicker, but you also don't use ellipses in place of every damn form of punctuation.
Reply
Leave a comment