I wanted to be more like you, but now that I have, I don't know who I've become...
I'm getting very frustrated about things that shouldn't frustrate me, all because of monday night. I have been on edge and the two people that should care the most haven't even tried contacting me. I hate that feeling when you don't know if somebody thinks that you are as good of friend to them as you think of him. (if that made sense) I love and hate how much i have changed at college. When I'm here I don't realize it, but then I go home and people say something, but they never say if it is good or bad.
Lately I've been feeling like i have alot on my plate, but alot of it shouldn't really concern me if it wasn't for that one night.
I slept last night, something I haven't done well in a few weeks now.
I don't know who came up with that stupid rhyme "Sticks and stones will break my bones but words will never hurt me!" Because that is bull shit! and if you ask me words hurt a hell of alot more then sticks and stones when they come from someone who you thought of as special. It isn't like I asked alot from them in the past, but I had a really tough past couple of weeks and just wanted my two favorite boys from Pac to come and visit me. I didn't feel like explaining why because I thought me just saying that would be enough, but nope, I was wrong. And now things are weird. I have never been so mad. And I don't know if I am more mad at them or myself. Maybe I was asking too much? But I do know that if the tables were turned, and they sounded like I did on the phone, I would have been there in a heart beat. There I go again caring too much. The part that sucks the most is that even though I think I have lost alot of my compassion for the human race, there are still alot of people I would do anything for at a drop of a hat, but I am well aware that they would not do the same for me.
I think its nice outside, but I need to clean my room really bad! Good music + Cleaning = hopefully better mood?
Lately I've been feeling like i have alot on my plate, but alot of it shouldn't really concern me if it wasn't for that one night.
I slept last night, something I haven't done well in a few weeks now.
I don't know who came up with that stupid rhyme "Sticks and stones will break my bones but words will never hurt me!" Because that is bull shit! and if you ask me words hurt a hell of alot more then sticks and stones when they come from someone who you thought of as special. It isn't like I asked alot from them in the past, but I had a really tough past couple of weeks and just wanted my two favorite boys from Pac to come and visit me. I didn't feel like explaining why because I thought me just saying that would be enough, but nope, I was wrong. And now things are weird. I have never been so mad. And I don't know if I am more mad at them or myself. Maybe I was asking too much? But I do know that if the tables were turned, and they sounded like I did on the phone, I would have been there in a heart beat. There I go again caring too much. The part that sucks the most is that even though I think I have lost alot of my compassion for the human race, there are still alot of people I would do anything for at a drop of a hat, but I am well aware that they would not do the same for me.
I think its nice outside, but I need to clean my room really bad! Good music + Cleaning = hopefully better mood?