(no subject)

[softly_crowing]

needing to do things has been making me uneasy.
like, really, this is live journal. and really,
im talking to all the people ive added as "friends".
i constantly want to be dead, because that to me is just
being nothing (more nothing than we are now) but who knows
if thats what its like. i do not feel like dealing with
how much living bothers me, and how i think everything is good
and bad. theres more bad. and suicide is kind of thought
of as selfish, but it doesnt matter. im me, and who cares
what anyone else thinks. im not going to do such a thing,
i just dont know what else to do. anything ill do will never
have me feeling fulfilled. maybe there will never be any
fulfillment and suffering is just whats gonna be done.
yea. i dont know, who cares