A reflection of this year....
wow, what an amazing year. Friend have become enemies, couples have become closer, and acquaintances have transformed into so much more. My year started off well, football games, going out with nick, homecoming was fun, getting to know the general environment of liberty. Through this period i really developed a sense of self, and a willingness to trust. I have gained so many friends this year. It's unbelievable. Thank you all for letting this experience be so unforgettable. At the end of the year, i was disanced from some, but grew closer to others. Summer is here and, in a sense, it's depressing. I'm going to miss the usual chaos around school of who likes who and what drama recently happened. But, in anther way, summer's are incredible. You get to hang out with people you don't get to see over the year. I plan on hanging out with alton and megan, people who go to different schools. I'm single for the first time in awhile, and i feel strangely unattached to everyone. I just don't care anymore about having a boyfriend. But, as ellen and i once talked about, i'm afraid i'm really addicted to kissing. this year ended with a conglomeration of stressfull finals and social situations that give me a headache just thinking about. Everybody seems so down. Sam broke up with me, again. I don't know what to think of that. I know a lot of people will disagree with me, but i just don't see anything outrageously wrong with him. I mean, every other guy i'm in contact with is either too excentric, to forward, or just too...blah, at the same time, i'm happy i'm single, i get to flirt, all that stuff. Another thing, is i think amy paull and i will never ever be friends again. Apparently she can't trust me, and i can't trust her, and we're just way too different to ever find common ground. But the yelling matches between the two of us were miserable, i hate being mean to people, and i hate listening to all of my negatives. I suppose you've all heard different things about me, from different sources. I don't really know how to deal with that, or make things better, but what i do know, is they're not all true. I love you all, so much. I wish things work out for all of you this summer. ugh, i don't know, it's just, pretty much the most irritating pile of shit to worry about ever. Yeah, and peter came over last night, that was fun. He's cool, but there'll never be a relationship beyond just friends with us. I hope that if you *the person reading this* and i have become distant over the past couple of weeks, or months, or even years, that you'll call me or talk to me, because i'm more than willing to regain some lost friendships. I've been slipping ont the social aspect of things lately. I don't know what I would do without the friends that i do have, however. They're so important to me. Especially rebecca and tanna, they helped me through a lot with all of my break ups and low points. They're really amazing people. All of you are. Thank you all for being my friends :)