I love me I love me not
Okay so there is an extent to loving yourself right? But is there an extent to not love yourself? I mean right now that I am with ashley I can't really say that I love myself but I think now I hold myself in higher reguard than I used to. I mean it used to be to the point where everyday I would avoid looking in the mirror, ashamed of what I saw. Scared that the mirror would reveal something that I didn't like. Another flaw that I would nit-pick about myself to the point of insanity. I think that in the past it was more "I love me not". So what is it that I want to proclaim in this entry? Maybe the mere fact that some people in this world love themselves too much, don't get me wrong I can really admire people that love themselves. But there is a point to where it gets annoying. AKA conceitedness. Love...I love others as you know...ashley. Some say how can you love others when you can't love youself first? honestly, I disagree with this. I think that it is easier for me to love someone else than it is for me to love myself. For example ashley, i love the girl to death, because she is a lot of things that I am not and I only wish that I could have done or that I could do. So as you see, it is hard to appreciate my accomplishments when I hold others in such high reguard. Is this what they mean by low self-esteem? I don't think that I have low self-esteem because I think that Im okay I just don't think I love myself very much. I pretty content with who I am but I think that I would change a lot of things about myself. Perfect them a little bit to where I like them. Question to self: Would I be content with who I am if I changed those things? or Should I just learn to accept them for what they are? I don't know. Change what you want, be happy with who you are and try to accept you for what you are right? Up for discussion...
P.S. A poem for ashley...
Stood alone in the crowd
Felt like I screaming but a whisper isn't that loud.
Didn't know where to turn
Lost and so afraid to be burned.
Met you and the scenery changed
Found out that life wasn't the one to blame.
Turned on the light so that I could see
Brought me back to life so I could finally be.
Didn't feel like I was in a crowd along
Finally found a hand to hold.
Searched and searched high and low.
There are things in life that I learned that I didn't know.
A feeling like this...
Being in total and complete bliss...
Used to being stuck in a black hole
Felt as though I had no soul
Found all of those things when I found you
Life graced me as one of the lucky few.
P.S. A poem for ashley...
Stood alone in the crowd
Felt like I screaming but a whisper isn't that loud.
Didn't know where to turn
Lost and so afraid to be burned.
Met you and the scenery changed
Found out that life wasn't the one to blame.
Turned on the light so that I could see
Brought me back to life so I could finally be.
Didn't feel like I was in a crowd along
Finally found a hand to hold.
Searched and searched high and low.
There are things in life that I learned that I didn't know.
A feeling like this...
Being in total and complete bliss...
Used to being stuck in a black hole
Felt as though I had no soul
Found all of those things when I found you
Life graced me as one of the lucky few.