(no subject)
I gave blood today.
But I feel kind of guilty.
Because I know, well actually, I think that I did it mostly out of wanting to help other people who need the blood, right?
But, at the same time, I really like what being a blood donar makes people think about you, you know? It's something to be proud of. It makes people think well of you. I like people to know that I donated blood.
But then, if you just do it so that people will know you did it, that's not altruistic at all is it? That's complete self centeredness. It's not a matter of helping others, it's a matter of improving your public image. It's narcissism. It makes me feel like a politician or something.
And so, you know, I ask myself, "Would I have done this if no one knew about it?".
And I honestly think I would. Yeah, I know that I would.
But even still, you know, there's still that selfish part of me that just cares about what's in it for me. The part that wants everybody to see the blood donor tee-shirt, and the bandage on my left arm. And I don't like that in me. I've been narcissistic in the past, and it's not a trait I'm proud of. In donating blood, it shouldn't be about me, it should be about the people I'm helping!
...I dunno.
I'm looking into maybe donating bone marrow once I'm 18...
But I feel kind of guilty.
Because I know, well actually, I think that I did it mostly out of wanting to help other people who need the blood, right?
But, at the same time, I really like what being a blood donar makes people think about you, you know? It's something to be proud of. It makes people think well of you. I like people to know that I donated blood.
But then, if you just do it so that people will know you did it, that's not altruistic at all is it? That's complete self centeredness. It's not a matter of helping others, it's a matter of improving your public image. It's narcissism. It makes me feel like a politician or something.
And so, you know, I ask myself, "Would I have done this if no one knew about it?".
And I honestly think I would. Yeah, I know that I would.
But even still, you know, there's still that selfish part of me that just cares about what's in it for me. The part that wants everybody to see the blood donor tee-shirt, and the bandage on my left arm. And I don't like that in me. I've been narcissistic in the past, and it's not a trait I'm proud of. In donating blood, it shouldn't be about me, it should be about the people I'm helping!
...I dunno.
I'm looking into maybe donating bone marrow once I'm 18...