Fan Fiction: How I Met Max Guevara
Title: How I Met Max Guevara
Fandom: Dark Angel
Rating/Warnings: G, and I didn't revise this at all.
Characters: Me, Max
Word count: 750
Summary: In honour of The Pulse, I wrote a weird little fan fiction starring me, Kiah, and how I met Max. IN THE FUTURE!
Finally taking the crazy, fandom laden, road trip adventure we had always mused on my friends and I had found ourselves in Seattle. We’d talked about such a trip since the mid-2000s, but it had taken us until nearly 2020 for anything to happen.
But now it was about 8:30 and I just had a hankering for some Cheetos. I asked around, but everyone was tired and busy planning the next stops on our trip, so I stepped out in the cool evening on my own. A mist of raindrops splattered on my face as the motel room door closed behind me. I held out my arm, testing to see if I should go back for an umbrella, but the rain wasn’t too bad. I looked toward the bright lights of the gas station up the street and was on my way.
Once I arrived I found myself pondering what else I could purchase. Should I get some ice cream? Maybe some Pringles? I should definitely get some pop. As I tapped my finger to my chin and looked around at the lay of the store my eyes caught on someone examining the cereal. Man, she really looks like Jessica Alba, I thought. And she did. She was completely indecipherable from Jessica Alba circa 2000.
She must’ve felt my eyes however, because she turned abruptly toward me. I looked away, but clearly I was caught. And oh crap, because this chick looked like she was on some serious paranoia trip. “Why are you staring at me?”
“You just reminded me of someone,” I said, playing it cool. “I was trying to figure out who it was I was thinking of. You know when someone is familiar, but you can’t figure out from where?”
“Not really.”
“I think that’s why the invented IMDB.”
She just stared at me like I was speaking Martian. “Anyway, sorry lady.” I said, turning away, but she grabbed my shoulder before I could get anywhere.
“Where did you see someone who looked like me?”
Oh great, she looked even more paranoid than before.
I rolled my eyes. “I don’t know, Sin City?” I joked, although I obviously shouldn’t have, since the fake Jessica Alba was obviously having some sort of problem, and I could tell by how she had grabbed my shoulder that she was very strong.
“And what the hell is IMDB?”
“Uh... The Internet Movie Data Base...” I said.
“You have the internet?”
“Uh, yeah.”
“But nobody has the internet,” she whispered. “You’d better keep it down or people’ll think you’re rich and I’m not going to protect you from getting mugged.”
I laughed and headed toward the Cheetos. I was just grabbing a bag off the shelf when I noticed fake Jessica Alba behind me again. She spoke in a whisper so low I could barely hear it, “no one has the internet anymore.
I nodded. “I’m really sorry I was staring at you, but I just wanted to get myself a snack.” I turned to the cooler and grabbed myself a bottle of root beer, and intentionally ignoring the lady I walked to the counter.
“But haven’t you ever heard of The Pulse?” I stopped dead in my tracks.
“Of course I have.”
“You know, the thing that wiped everything out; made everything said on your end of our conversation impossible.”
“Yes. I’ve heard of it. I lived through it. I was at work that day in a pre-school room, playing Legos with a little boy and trying to bring rhyming into a conversation about Star Wars. I know all about The Pulse, including the fact that it never happened.”
I was met with silence. Fake Jessica Alba’s large lips were opening and closing like a fish.
“Where are we?” she finally asked.
“Seattle” I said, then for good measure I added, “2020.”
She breathed, looking relieved, but then looked outside. “Gas is still sold at pumps?”
“How else would it be sold?” I asked and then I realized. Of course, this woman was used to gas being sold by the gallon off the back of a truck. This woman who thought the Pulse happened, and was allowed to live in a reality where it did happen for nine and a half years. Only that reality ended when my reality caught up with hers, and now here she is, stuck in this alternate world.
She swallowed with a gulp. “I think I’m going to need to sit down.”
I nodded me too.
Fandom: Dark Angel
Rating/Warnings: G, and I didn't revise this at all.
Characters: Me, Max
Word count: 750
Summary: In honour of The Pulse, I wrote a weird little fan fiction starring me, Kiah, and how I met Max. IN THE FUTURE!
Finally taking the crazy, fandom laden, road trip adventure we had always mused on my friends and I had found ourselves in Seattle. We’d talked about such a trip since the mid-2000s, but it had taken us until nearly 2020 for anything to happen.
But now it was about 8:30 and I just had a hankering for some Cheetos. I asked around, but everyone was tired and busy planning the next stops on our trip, so I stepped out in the cool evening on my own. A mist of raindrops splattered on my face as the motel room door closed behind me. I held out my arm, testing to see if I should go back for an umbrella, but the rain wasn’t too bad. I looked toward the bright lights of the gas station up the street and was on my way.
Once I arrived I found myself pondering what else I could purchase. Should I get some ice cream? Maybe some Pringles? I should definitely get some pop. As I tapped my finger to my chin and looked around at the lay of the store my eyes caught on someone examining the cereal. Man, she really looks like Jessica Alba, I thought. And she did. She was completely indecipherable from Jessica Alba circa 2000.
She must’ve felt my eyes however, because she turned abruptly toward me. I looked away, but clearly I was caught. And oh crap, because this chick looked like she was on some serious paranoia trip. “Why are you staring at me?”
“You just reminded me of someone,” I said, playing it cool. “I was trying to figure out who it was I was thinking of. You know when someone is familiar, but you can’t figure out from where?”
“Not really.”
“I think that’s why the invented IMDB.”
She just stared at me like I was speaking Martian. “Anyway, sorry lady.” I said, turning away, but she grabbed my shoulder before I could get anywhere.
“Where did you see someone who looked like me?”
Oh great, she looked even more paranoid than before.
I rolled my eyes. “I don’t know, Sin City?” I joked, although I obviously shouldn’t have, since the fake Jessica Alba was obviously having some sort of problem, and I could tell by how she had grabbed my shoulder that she was very strong.
“And what the hell is IMDB?”
“Uh... The Internet Movie Data Base...” I said.
“You have the internet?”
“Uh, yeah.”
“But nobody has the internet,” she whispered. “You’d better keep it down or people’ll think you’re rich and I’m not going to protect you from getting mugged.”
I laughed and headed toward the Cheetos. I was just grabbing a bag off the shelf when I noticed fake Jessica Alba behind me again. She spoke in a whisper so low I could barely hear it, “no one has the internet anymore.
I nodded. “I’m really sorry I was staring at you, but I just wanted to get myself a snack.” I turned to the cooler and grabbed myself a bottle of root beer, and intentionally ignoring the lady I walked to the counter.
“But haven’t you ever heard of The Pulse?” I stopped dead in my tracks.
“Of course I have.”
“You know, the thing that wiped everything out; made everything said on your end of our conversation impossible.”
“Yes. I’ve heard of it. I lived through it. I was at work that day in a pre-school room, playing Legos with a little boy and trying to bring rhyming into a conversation about Star Wars. I know all about The Pulse, including the fact that it never happened.”
I was met with silence. Fake Jessica Alba’s large lips were opening and closing like a fish.
“Where are we?” she finally asked.
“Seattle” I said, then for good measure I added, “2020.”
She breathed, looking relieved, but then looked outside. “Gas is still sold at pumps?”
“How else would it be sold?” I asked and then I realized. Of course, this woman was used to gas being sold by the gallon off the back of a truck. This woman who thought the Pulse happened, and was allowed to live in a reality where it did happen for nine and a half years. Only that reality ended when my reality caught up with hers, and now here she is, stuck in this alternate world.
She swallowed with a gulp. “I think I’m going to need to sit down.”
I nodded me too.