I should be happier

[societalenigma]

Given all the things I have accomplished and the opportunities in muisc presented for me, I should be happier. Yet, I'm discontent because it should have been easier and I should have done better. It's an endless struggle, when I get what I want I'm still not satisfied because I'm not ready yet for that which I seek; continuously the lack of

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My philosophy

[societalenigma]

I'm not always down or whatever. If I didn't put preasure of myself to do well, then my aptitude or desire to succeed in fullest would not be the same. It's true I should be quick on the uptake with everything, get super serious about my paths , push to be ahead or least be on the ball with things. But Sarra, you need to understand it's my fear of failure that drives a lot of the time. I'm working on being more virtuous, until I am then I have to see the threat of hell and be critical of myself... I should be confident and assertive. Confidence coms with security about how your path is the only way for you... I like to keep my mind open...

Last year, I was really insecure and not confident. I"m beyond that now and am in the plain of reestablishing my dignity, improving my conditions, so that eventually they'll be no doubt in my mind that I will succeed in what ever I do if I put forth enough effort to achieve.

I am not a intutive person, I am not briliant, I am self-made, whatever I achieved it's because worked hard to reach it.