Now he sings, now he sobs

[societalenigma]

Sitting alone on the bus, on the way to school and once again now, I just inadvertly shed anxiety and stress filled tears. Like I had been felling kind of funny all morning reflecting on my life, particularly the quality of and how I got here. I think its remarkable how much I've been trying to block out these feelings with strong language and emotional outbursts from a man that never used to swear or have any feeling of ill-intentions towards anyone. It frustrates how insecure I feel; I should be able to cope with these issues- I dealt with worse before. I had them under control for a while, now I'm returning to the Dana of old. Yet, when my tears dropped upon my cheeks, I wasn't feeling devastated about anything and was starting to notice how beautiful life and the music I am listening to is, though, I am pretty anxious. I don't know what to make of it. :'-|

BTW, a girl looked at me and smiled when I started to cry and I forced a smile out.