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Julia, the Human Hosepipe
By: Alexa
It was a crisp day in February and the 5th years at Hogwarts were preparing for the Valentine's trip to Hogsmeade. The Gryffindor common room was buzzing with excitement, it's accupants hurrying to dress.
"So Harry, I was thinking -" Hermione was interrupted by an eager post owl tapping on the glass of the near-by window. Hermione's eyes widened as she read the letter. Before Harry or Ron had the time to question her, she was heading off to the owlery.
"Sometimes I wonder why we're friends with that nutter." Ron said. But Harry was not listening. His stomach was doing backflips as he and Ron walked down to the entrance hall. He had a date with Julia Schuurman, the hottest Ravenclas in the sixth year. But that wasn't the only reasons Harry's insides were squirming; at the last DA meeting Julia had practically attacked Harry under the mistletoe, and then started to cry while they were "snogging". What if Julia was going to cry again? Worse, what if she wanted to talk about Cedric?
"You all right, mate?" Ron asked, interrupting his thoughts.
"Yeah, fine." Harry said. Just then he spotted Julia.
"Hi Harry." Julia said, blushing and pushing up her sexy glasses.
Harry walked towards her. "Er ... hi Julia." They walked in silence until they got to the gates that head into Hogsmeade.
"Well, here we are." Said Harry glancing around Hogsmeade as two third years stared at the shops in awe. A light rain was starting to fall.
"Shall we go into Madam Puddifoot's? It's a charming little coffee shop." Julia said. Without waiting for an answer, she lead Harry into a coffee shop decorated in pink frills and Valentine's Day signs. Julia dragged Harry into a booth in the corner and promptly started to "snog" him.
"Er ... " Said Harry as he pulled away from Julia, in shock.
"Oh." Julia said, with a hurt expression on her face.
Harry looked beside them to see Roger Davies and some blonde girl holding hands.
"Roger Davies asked me out yesterday. But I turned him down."
"Er ... "Said Harry, yet again at a loss for words. Just then the song "Sex on the Beach" came on the radio.
Harry was reaching across the table to take Julia's hand as she jolted, her hand falling to her side. Harry reached for the sugar bowl to cover up his lunge across the table. Then he noticed Julia was crying again.
"Er ... Julia ... what's wrong?" Harry asked, glancing around the room.
"Cedric and I had sex on the beach."
"Er ... uh ... uhm ... " Harry said, trying to find something to say that would console her. But before he could do so, Julia had dashed out the door.
"And now, please welcome our special guests Harry and the Potters!" Said the witch at the bar. As Harry listened to their first song, Harry felt as if the lyrics were written for him. He tipped the band as he left to go find Ron.
Cho Chang what have I done,
I don't want to know where you and Cedric were snogging.
Cho Chang what have I done,
I'd rather not talk about your dead ex-boyfriends over coffee.
The End