Nov 23, 2005 13:39
i dunno whats wrong with me.
this is gonna be a big blur of a post.
ive been thinking a lot about my life and my work lately.
mainly about my work.
i spent a long time producing photographs.
making images i like. very technical, kind of conceptual, kinda silly.
i have a portfolio of work that ive done at art center.
and like 25 books of images i did while i was at art center, but on the side.
little books of images from the streets, trips, trains, bands, beach, people. etc.
and these are the things i LOVE to shoot.
the other stuff i love too. because its photography.
but the images in the outside work is what i LOVE to do.
so im in a tight spot.
i had a meeting with the heads of the photo dept at my school.
and this came up.
they told me to ditch my technical work and go for my happiness work.
i cant help but agree, but its fucking scary.
to go gung ho for something you love is a scary thing.
im also extremely afraid of failure.
its not the feel of failure im afraid of, rather the consequences of failure.
so now i have to plan some mroe shoots.
but im teetering between my more commercial work, and the work i love to do.
i need to figure out how to merge the 2.
easier said than done.
and in this process i feel completely dry of ideas.
i dont wanna over conseptualize.
and i dont wanna be too bland and "mockumentary".
i dunno what to do.
theres more but i gotta go.
xo