just bend the peices till they fit.like they where made for it.but they werent ment for this

[soccerfever]

.. she is finally back from her cabin.

So yeah i talked to her and she denied everything.. but whatever what if it all was a lie.. and she isnt fake... i dont know anymore.. all i know is that we arnt really friends anymore and its over between us.. iam not going to beat the fuck out of her anymore.. thats was once again stupid. like me. so wont call me.. she isnt aloud.. my mom hates her.. and all the girls that left the house that night..
but didnt we sware we wouldnt speak of that that?? yeah.. didnt we all..
so she talked shit and played with my head.. so what? i learned..

i draw little windowcracks of blood, etching line after line until it stops hurting.

...it looks like i arm-wrestled a rosebush.

hmm yes i do like that.. *but it isnt me*

yeah theres stupid drama and things go around.. not knowing who to believe and how things run around you in circles and your led into wrong directions.. and then not knowing where to turn... everyone knows what i mean.. when your traped.. like sitting on a rooftop and your only way out is to jump.. well my only way out is too let go.. like to jump.. and it isnt easy.. and trust me it will hurt like hell.

she plans to move out to her cabin.. poor girl.. to run away from everything. it might do her some good.. come back around highschool and some will think she is still her awful self.. others wont understand and will jugde.. and then some wont knwo what to think of her..

heck i sometimes think there is more to life then friends.. but if we dont have eachother.. then what would we have?? thats stupid boy.. or that place in your room where you sit.. nothing.

But i Belive in you so much.. I could die from the words that you say..

*deep breaths*

Yeah and i carry on day after day.. stupid things that run through my head.. heck iam so messed up i do dumb things that i donno even know whats right and whats wrong..

hard luck, you been tryin to tame..

Maybe its love but its like you said.. love is like a role that we play.

yeah..

so today i hung with the guys.. and hannah came over today.. i need a break..

time to myslelf.. ya and then we went over to justin's dad's house.. and hung out there for a little

while.. then i left and who knows what happend..

**hannah had fun**

so when i get home kelsie jezak.. calls me and starts to bitch at me.. for saying i said that she said hannah looks like a dea dog without her maycup.. wow.. i didnt even make that up.. it was kelsie and her mom and i just so happend to be on the phone.. so i donno she is gay tellin hannah i was lieing to her. saying i cant admit up to it.. ok.. whatever.. she can go to hell.. i mean its just stupid how all the girls cant like be nice to eachother.. its like thats the fake and retared world and the real world is the nice girls.. like the ones me and hillary go snowboarding with.. ya and they know who they are..

mmhmm

Marcella.. ♥

Sharp disaster in a fresh new coma

Was it worth it when it was over

Proving yourself right

You'd make the biggest noise

I'd lock my hands behind my head

I'd cover my heart and hit the deck

I'd brace myself for the impact if I were you

(It's a long wait) Is there anything

(For an answer) Worth looking for

(Is there any news) Worth loving for

(Is there any word) Worth lieing for

(Was there trauma) Is there anything

(Or a struggle) Worth waiting for

(Am I missing) Worth living for

(Or was the body found) Worth dying for

Home.. I'm home.