(no subject)

[sobotachick]

so i don't update much....that's cause there really isn't anthing new in my life and there won't be anything new for a long time. oh well....seconds last weeks it seems. only those moments where I think about it. But it's hard not to think about it since it's only the one thing i've wanted my entire life. expecially on Halloween when there are tons of cute kids around reminding me of the fact that all I've ever wanted to be is a wife and a mother. yes, i'm sure you are all thinking, "why are you in college then?" lol but I am in college because i want to work some just not full time. personal trainers can work as much as they want to, which will work out well for me. So in case anyone was wondering about me and how I am doing...there it is....seconds last weeks....this semester seems like it's been a few years and I am not getting any more excited about having a long engagement. 19 months and 2 days just in case you were wondering....yeah act surprised and go "wow that's far away" I already knew that simple fact, but people remind me all the time. When I say that I'm getting married the second of June, they get semi-excited because they think I mean this coming June.....but no....I mean June 2, 2007. not 7 months from 19 months.... You are all probably thinking...."just be happy you know who are you going to marry" i get that a lot too.....it would be amazing....if I were able to actually see him and spend time with him. and by spending time with him...i do not mean sitting in sammy's lounge or in my car....don't think gross we really do just sit and talk in my car. now, see next year will be better, we will actually get to spend quality time together in the evenings, because we will be off campus. but there is still about 10 months until that happens, and in between that is him going far away for an internship and us trying to figure out new creative ways to get to see eachother at school. This is difficult since I have been attempting to figure out new and creative ways to see him for almost two and a half years. Now, our friends who got married were supposed to let us come over to their apartment and chil there sometimes, but they moved to arizona...so now all we have is my car, the car wouldn't be that bad if campus safety didn't enjoy coming up to cars with people in them and turning on their lights and coming up with a flashlight to make sure everything is ok. ya know, there should be a building for the engaged people to hang out in. I don't know something....how are people supposed to have relationships in this environment, i just don't get it. I don't know, maybe they should have open house in the middle of the weeks too, like from 7-11 on wednesdays or something....i think that would be nice. yes, I am whining...i will stop now though
This is probably the most honest journal I have ever written