Offerings to the Fiction Gods
Hmm. I've had a conversation floating around in my head for about a week. I don't have the chops for a full story, but it's Sherlock/John Watson. Sherlock's trying to train a cat and John isn't convinced he can get the result he wants.
Cats & Doctors Are Often Difficult to Manage
"Sherlock, you're not going to be able to train the cat to fetch your slippers. Vomit on them, possibly, but not fetch," John sighed, watching the cat swat enthusiastically at Sherlock from under the sofa. "Cats don't take well to training."
"I trained you, didn't I?" Sherlock crooned, kneeling down to stare the cat in the eye. "Don't be obstreperous, you're agitating Poppet."
John snorted and settled into his overstuffed chair. "Your idea of 'training' involved jumping out at me whilst wearing no pants, and demanding that I let you fellate me. No, pardon me, it was 'osculate your genitalia'," John mocked, imitating Sherlock's deeper voice.
"It worked, didn't it? We could have been shagging months ago, but I was going on advice from your sister. Though your missish fluttering was very amusing." Sherlock swore as the cat connected with the tip of his nose.
John threw a rolled-up newspaper at Sherlock's dressing-gowned arse, as it waved in the air. "Harry warned me you were asking very personal questions; it's why I didn't trust your motives, you odd bastard. That cat is going to mistake your prick for a toy if you're not careful. When it happens, I won't osculate it better."
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It kind of cracks me up every time I run it through my head. I offer this snippet up to anyone who has some idea WHY Sherlock wants to train a cat, or who can expand on how he decided that random ambushes of nakedness were the best method to get John to shag him... also, exactly what WAS Harry's advice to Sherlock?
All I ask in return is a link to the finished fic.
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Now playing: The Beatles - Days Like These
http://foxytunes.com/artist/the+beatles/track/days+like+these
Cats & Doctors Are Often Difficult to Manage
"Sherlock, you're not going to be able to train the cat to fetch your slippers. Vomit on them, possibly, but not fetch," John sighed, watching the cat swat enthusiastically at Sherlock from under the sofa. "Cats don't take well to training."
"I trained you, didn't I?" Sherlock crooned, kneeling down to stare the cat in the eye. "Don't be obstreperous, you're agitating Poppet."
John snorted and settled into his overstuffed chair. "Your idea of 'training' involved jumping out at me whilst wearing no pants, and demanding that I let you fellate me. No, pardon me, it was 'osculate your genitalia'," John mocked, imitating Sherlock's deeper voice.
"It worked, didn't it? We could have been shagging months ago, but I was going on advice from your sister. Though your missish fluttering was very amusing." Sherlock swore as the cat connected with the tip of his nose.
John threw a rolled-up newspaper at Sherlock's dressing-gowned arse, as it waved in the air. "Harry warned me you were asking very personal questions; it's why I didn't trust your motives, you odd bastard. That cat is going to mistake your prick for a toy if you're not careful. When it happens, I won't osculate it better."
----------------
It kind of cracks me up every time I run it through my head. I offer this snippet up to anyone who has some idea WHY Sherlock wants to train a cat, or who can expand on how he decided that random ambushes of nakedness were the best method to get John to shag him... also, exactly what WAS Harry's advice to Sherlock?
All I ask in return is a link to the finished fic.
----------------
Now playing: The Beatles - Days Like These
http://foxytunes.com/artist/the+beatles/track/days+like+these