First Contact!
I finally worked up the nerve to pester the much-admired-by-me Sevviepoo last night, and decided to be a slightly-squiffy SoberLoki. I also had a conversation going with Terry Boot, which seemed to annoy him a little (is this perhaps just his personality?), but amused me to no end.
I'll only post my favorite bits, as the whole thing was quite long... that being said, here we go!
Oh, and if someone could show me how to do a cut...? You will have my undying devotion, and I'll say very nice things about you to all of my friends.
Part the First:
OneMoreSoberLoki (11:40:51 PM): I've got the impression your Ministry of Magic doesn't like Muggles to know about Wizards. Is everyone going to be in trouble for being on the internet and talking to us?
shouldteachdada (11:41:55 PM): Well, I do not suppose so. The interweb is such an anonymous medium, that there is really no saying who you are talking to.
OneMoreSoberLoki (11:42:35 PM): True enough. For all I know, you're simply a very devious person, making up stories... but I don't like to think it of you, sir.
shouldteachdada (11:42:58 PM): I do appreciate that, Miss Loki.
OneMoreSoberLoki (11:44:11 PM): I suspect you're a man of honor, sir, and I don't believe you're really plotting against Harry Potter.
shouldteachdada (11:44:48 PM): I appreciate that as well. Of course it would be ridiculous for a professor to plot against one of his students!
OneMoreSoberLoki (11:45:13 PM): That rude Potter fellow certainly has strange ideas at times, doesn't he?
shouldteachdada (11:45:29 PM): He does at that!
OneMoreSoberLoki (11:45:38 PM): Erm, do you know if he's seeing anyone right now?
OneMoreSoberLoki (11:45:50 PM): No, no, forget I asked.
shouldteachdada (11:46:29 PM): Potter? I do not believe so. Who could put up with that mouth?
Part the Second:
OneMoreSoberLoki (11:50:24 PM): Pardon, sir. Have had some vodka in my chocolate milk tonight.
shouldteachdada (11:50:44 PM): Oh that sounds like a horrible concoction!
OneMoreSoberLoki (11:51:14 PM): Actually, pretty good. And it increases my typing speed considerably, for some reason.
shouldteachdada (11:51:37 PM): Maybe it is the calcium?
OneMoreSoberLoki (11:52:24 PM): Could be. And the carbs. Bad carbs. Ooh, terrible Dr Atkins! I think your Voldemort has ventured into the Muggle world and renamed himself. Rotten bugger.
OneMoreSoberLoki (11:52:52 PM): Pardon my lip! Bad vodka. Accountants shouldn't drink vodka.
shouldteachdada (11:53:17 PM): I have heard Voldemort referred to as 'Rotten bugger' before, actually.
OneMoreSoberLoki (11:54:05 PM): No no no, Dr Atkins! HE says we can't eat carbohydrates. I think it's a plot to make us all logy so we won't resist when he tries to take over.
shouldteachdada (11:54:49 PM): I see. Perhaps he is alligned with the Dark Lord. Or, as you say, an alias of Voldemort.
OneMoreSoberLoki (11:55:24 PM): Very likely, I'd say. Did you know Dr Atkins insists we do complicated math just to figure out what we're allowed to eat? Very bad man.
shouldteachdada (11:55:49 PM): Math? For food? That does sound rather evil.
OneMoreSoberLoki (11:56:20 PM): See? And when you don't eat enough your brains goes all stupid, and the math gets even more difficult!
shouldteachdada (11:56:51 PM): A vicious circle, indeed! How brilliantly evil!
OneMoreSoberLoki (11:57:08 PM): zackly. I mean, exactly.
OneMoreSoberLoki (12:00:12 AM): You know, there's a lot of color on the internet, you were right about that. It kind of makes my brains hurt.
shouldteachdada (12:00:48 AM): Oh, you will really feel that pain come tomorrow. It is much worse afterward.
OneMoreSoberLoki (12:00:57 AM): Do you like music, Perfesser?
shouldteachdada (12:01:15 AM): I do. I quite enjoy disco, in particular.
OneMoreSoberLoki (12:01:51 AM): There's a song about Barry Botter... that isn't quite right, is it?
shouldteachdada (12:02:20 AM): I am not familiar with a 'Barry Botter' tune, no.
OneMoreSoberLoki (12:03:37 AM): Harry Potter. There. Looked it up. It's Harry Potter Song by Christopher Alan. Would you like me to send you the file?
shouldteachdada (12:04:08 AM): Oh, grand. Now there are odes to that prat?
OneMoreSoberLoki (12:04:30 AM): Hee! You said 'odes'.
shouldteachdada (12:05:07 AM): Very well. shouldteachdada @livejournal.com
OneMoreSoberLoki (12:05:25 AM): Alright. Here I go.
shouldteachdada (12:06:53 AM): I must attend to something, Miss Loki...I should return shortly.
OneMoreSoberLoki (12:07:09 AM): Alright, sir!
OneMoreSoberLoki (12:14:31 AM): *burble burble burble* Sir?
shouldteachdada (12:14:52 AM): Yes, sorry about that.
OneMoreSoberLoki (12:15:15 AM): Terry Boot is mocking me because I fell off my chair.
OneMoreSoberLoki (12:15:24 AM): And because I only had toast today.
shouldteachdada (12:16:42 AM): Toast, milk and vodka. That is quite a mix.
OneMoreSoberLoki (12:16:48 AM): You know, disco was so underappreciated.
shouldteachdada (12:17:03 AM): I agree, I agree.
OneMoreSoberLoki (12:17:32 AM): Stayin Alive. Profound. Whether you're a mother or whether you're a brother.
OneMoreSoberLoki (12:18:01 AM): My Mum says disco sicks. Sucks. You know. What they all say.
shouldteachdada (12:18:07 AM): Exactly. They just do not write them like that anymore.
OneMoreSoberLoki (12:33:26 AM): Hmm. Mum says I have to go off the computer now. I HOPE WITE-OUT PROVES HELPFUL. Hee! I hit capslock. Goodnight, Presser Snake.
shouldteachdada (12:34:03 AM): Good night, not-so-sober Loki.
Mad fangirly SQUEEEEE-ing commenced thereafter. I :heart: Presser Snake. And yes, the song is real and is actually kinda good. Feel free to ask for it, I can email it to you if you're interested.
But then there was this conversation, with Terry Boot - explains the falling-off-chair thing.
OneMoreSoberLoki (11:50:55 PM): Oooh, I'm having vodka in my chocolate milk. It's really quite yummy.
aterryblepun (11:52:11 PM): Sounds good.
OneMoreSoberLoki (11:53:20 PM): Yummmmm.
OneMoreSoberLoki (11:55:42 PM): And it tastes like an innocent beverage. My Mum never knows.
aterryblepun (11:56:09 PM): Then how is that 'yummy'?
OneMoreSoberLoki (11:56:42 PM): The warming burn as it glides down one's gullet is delicious.
aterryblepun (11:57:25 PM): Then explain again how your mother doesn't tell? Is she just really stupid?
OneMoreSoberLoki (11:58:10 PM): She doesn't like chocolate milk. She never tastes it. But she smells it, and it's still undetectable.
OneMoreSoberLoki (11:58:46 PM): Hee! I am so wickedly clever. And a little sloshed, actually. You're sort of cute.
aterryblepun (11:59:10 PM): I see. This is a good system. It is a better system to get your mum not to care, but this is almost as good.
aterryblepun (11:59:24 PM): Thanks.
OneMoreSoberLoki (12:02:20 AM): You're fascinating when you ignore me, did you know that?
aterryblepun (12:04:16 AM): Well, I find it more fascinating when I'm ignoring you. So in a sense, yes.
OneMoreSoberLoki (12:05:06 AM): Aww, we're getting along so well, aren't we? My Mum says when a boy agrees with you it's because he likes you.
aterryblepun (12:06:15 AM): That could make sense if your mum consistently tends to be wrong.
OneMoreSoberLoki (12:09:42 AM): Oops, sorry for making you wait. I fell off my chair and didn't notice right away.
aterryblepun (12:11:36 AM): That you fell off your chair? You're fucking pissed, aren't yeh?
OneMoreSoberLoki (12:12:06 AM): I've only had three chocolate milks so far! I can't be swotty yet.
OneMoreSoberLoki (12:12:17 AM): Snot possible.
aterryblepun (12:13:12 AM): Did you not eat today?
OneMoreSoberLoki (12:13:50 AM): Erm... I think I forgot again. No! No! I had toast.
aterryblepun (12:14:50 AM): Toast.
OneMoreSoberLoki (12:15:43 AM): Toast. Really warm sliced bread. With some strawberry preserves.
aterryblepun (12:16:27 AM): spreadable fruit, or jam?
OneMoreSoberLoki (12:17:00 AM): Spendable fruit. Yeah.
aterryblepun (12:17:31 AM): Jam is better.
OneMoreSoberLoki (12:19:05 AM): Why is jam better?
aterryblepun (12:20:09 AM): It tastes better. Do I look like a cook to you?
OneMoreSoberLoki (12:21:12 AM): Sure. Some cooks are cute and blurry. Right? Not Emeril. Emeril looks like he got hit in the stomach with the flat of a shovel and never got over it.
aterryblepun (12:22:39 AM): I've never seen Emeril, nor do I have any interest in doing so.
aterryblepun (12:22:59 AM): Nigella Lawson, however...
OneMoreSoberLoki (12:23:02 AM): That's prolly good. BAM! Makes the head hurt.
OneMoreSoberLoki (12:23:22 AM): Ooh, I know who she is. She's just blurry, not cute.
aterryblepun (12:24:25 AM): Blurry?
OneMoreSoberLoki (12:24:38 AM): Like fuzzy but only at the edges?
aterryblepun (12:27:03 AM): This is a bad explanation.
OneMoreSoberLoki (12:28:01 AM): Well pardon me Mr Boot - hey, I bought some new boots last week. Leather. Black ones. They have these laces that go all the way up under my skirt. Mum doesn't know I have them yet.
OneMoreSoberLoki (12:29:00 AM): Mum is SUCh a killjoy.
aterryblepun (12:33:15 AM): This is their purpose.
OneMoreSoberLoki (12:35:30 AM): Are you talking to other girls, Terry? I will be very displeased if you are. Boys don't talk to other girls when they are talking to girls they like, my Mum says.
OneMoreSoberLoki (12:36:33 AM): Of course my Mum is on her third marriage so maybe she's not the most reliable source...
aterryblepun (12:36:54 AM): hah.
OneMoreSoberLoki (12:37:24 AM): I'm sleepy now. And the chair isn't good for sleeping. I fall off it.
OneMoreSoberLoki (12:37:44 AM): More chocolate milk!
OneMoreSoberLoki (12:38:14 AM): Would you like some undetectable chocolate milk, Terry?
aterryblepun (12:40:04 AM): I would, assuming that it is not the chocolate milk that is undetectable. Alas, I have no chocolate milk
OneMoreSoberLoki (12:41:49 AM): That's a terrible shame. I have to go to sleep now, Mum is making me go off the computer. I was shouting at my brother to leave me alone, and now I'm in trouble. Goodnight, Terry-Who-Likes-Me.
OneMoreSoberLoki (12:42:39 AM): Will your friends be terribly scandalized that you like a Muggle?
aterryblepun (12:43:34 AM): No, especially since it is not true.
OneMoreSoberLoki (12:44:13 AM): How cruel! You agreed with me earlier, and that means you like me!
aterryblepun (12:45:28 AM): My heart goes out to you.
OneMoreSoberLoki (12:45:44 AM): Fine! You're far too inattentive to my needs, Terry Boot. I'm dumping you. Yes, I'M dumping YOU. And that's just what I'm going to tell everyone! So don't get any ideas about saying you dumped me, because it's just not on.
aterryblepun (12:46:05 AM): Righto.
OneMoreSoberLoki (12:46:51 AM): Gods, but you're cute when you're indifferent... no! You won't seduce me again with your chill exterior! Goodnight!
BWAaaahhaaaaahaaa! I amuse me.
I'll only post my favorite bits, as the whole thing was quite long... that being said, here we go!
Oh, and if someone could show me how to do a cut...? You will have my undying devotion, and I'll say very nice things about you to all of my friends.
Part the First:
OneMoreSoberLoki (11:40:51 PM): I've got the impression your Ministry of Magic doesn't like Muggles to know about Wizards. Is everyone going to be in trouble for being on the internet and talking to us?
shouldteachdada (11:41:55 PM): Well, I do not suppose so. The interweb is such an anonymous medium, that there is really no saying who you are talking to.
OneMoreSoberLoki (11:42:35 PM): True enough. For all I know, you're simply a very devious person, making up stories... but I don't like to think it of you, sir.
shouldteachdada (11:42:58 PM): I do appreciate that, Miss Loki.
OneMoreSoberLoki (11:44:11 PM): I suspect you're a man of honor, sir, and I don't believe you're really plotting against Harry Potter.
shouldteachdada (11:44:48 PM): I appreciate that as well. Of course it would be ridiculous for a professor to plot against one of his students!
OneMoreSoberLoki (11:45:13 PM): That rude Potter fellow certainly has strange ideas at times, doesn't he?
shouldteachdada (11:45:29 PM): He does at that!
OneMoreSoberLoki (11:45:38 PM): Erm, do you know if he's seeing anyone right now?
OneMoreSoberLoki (11:45:50 PM): No, no, forget I asked.
shouldteachdada (11:46:29 PM): Potter? I do not believe so. Who could put up with that mouth?
Part the Second:
OneMoreSoberLoki (11:50:24 PM): Pardon, sir. Have had some vodka in my chocolate milk tonight.
shouldteachdada (11:50:44 PM): Oh that sounds like a horrible concoction!
OneMoreSoberLoki (11:51:14 PM): Actually, pretty good. And it increases my typing speed considerably, for some reason.
shouldteachdada (11:51:37 PM): Maybe it is the calcium?
OneMoreSoberLoki (11:52:24 PM): Could be. And the carbs. Bad carbs. Ooh, terrible Dr Atkins! I think your Voldemort has ventured into the Muggle world and renamed himself. Rotten bugger.
OneMoreSoberLoki (11:52:52 PM): Pardon my lip! Bad vodka. Accountants shouldn't drink vodka.
shouldteachdada (11:53:17 PM): I have heard Voldemort referred to as 'Rotten bugger' before, actually.
OneMoreSoberLoki (11:54:05 PM): No no no, Dr Atkins! HE says we can't eat carbohydrates. I think it's a plot to make us all logy so we won't resist when he tries to take over.
shouldteachdada (11:54:49 PM): I see. Perhaps he is alligned with the Dark Lord. Or, as you say, an alias of Voldemort.
OneMoreSoberLoki (11:55:24 PM): Very likely, I'd say. Did you know Dr Atkins insists we do complicated math just to figure out what we're allowed to eat? Very bad man.
shouldteachdada (11:55:49 PM): Math? For food? That does sound rather evil.
OneMoreSoberLoki (11:56:20 PM): See? And when you don't eat enough your brains goes all stupid, and the math gets even more difficult!
shouldteachdada (11:56:51 PM): A vicious circle, indeed! How brilliantly evil!
OneMoreSoberLoki (11:57:08 PM): zackly. I mean, exactly.
OneMoreSoberLoki (12:00:12 AM): You know, there's a lot of color on the internet, you were right about that. It kind of makes my brains hurt.
shouldteachdada (12:00:48 AM): Oh, you will really feel that pain come tomorrow. It is much worse afterward.
OneMoreSoberLoki (12:00:57 AM): Do you like music, Perfesser?
shouldteachdada (12:01:15 AM): I do. I quite enjoy disco, in particular.
OneMoreSoberLoki (12:01:51 AM): There's a song about Barry Botter... that isn't quite right, is it?
shouldteachdada (12:02:20 AM): I am not familiar with a 'Barry Botter' tune, no.
OneMoreSoberLoki (12:03:37 AM): Harry Potter. There. Looked it up. It's Harry Potter Song by Christopher Alan. Would you like me to send you the file?
shouldteachdada (12:04:08 AM): Oh, grand. Now there are odes to that prat?
OneMoreSoberLoki (12:04:30 AM): Hee! You said 'odes'.
shouldteachdada (12:05:07 AM): Very well. shouldteachdada @livejournal.com
OneMoreSoberLoki (12:05:25 AM): Alright. Here I go.
shouldteachdada (12:06:53 AM): I must attend to something, Miss Loki...I should return shortly.
OneMoreSoberLoki (12:07:09 AM): Alright, sir!
OneMoreSoberLoki (12:14:31 AM): *burble burble burble* Sir?
shouldteachdada (12:14:52 AM): Yes, sorry about that.
OneMoreSoberLoki (12:15:15 AM): Terry Boot is mocking me because I fell off my chair.
OneMoreSoberLoki (12:15:24 AM): And because I only had toast today.
shouldteachdada (12:16:42 AM): Toast, milk and vodka. That is quite a mix.
OneMoreSoberLoki (12:16:48 AM): You know, disco was so underappreciated.
shouldteachdada (12:17:03 AM): I agree, I agree.
OneMoreSoberLoki (12:17:32 AM): Stayin Alive. Profound. Whether you're a mother or whether you're a brother.
OneMoreSoberLoki (12:18:01 AM): My Mum says disco sicks. Sucks. You know. What they all say.
shouldteachdada (12:18:07 AM): Exactly. They just do not write them like that anymore.
OneMoreSoberLoki (12:33:26 AM): Hmm. Mum says I have to go off the computer now. I HOPE WITE-OUT PROVES HELPFUL. Hee! I hit capslock. Goodnight, Presser Snake.
shouldteachdada (12:34:03 AM): Good night, not-so-sober Loki.
Mad fangirly SQUEEEEE-ing commenced thereafter. I :heart: Presser Snake. And yes, the song is real and is actually kinda good. Feel free to ask for it, I can email it to you if you're interested.
But then there was this conversation, with Terry Boot - explains the falling-off-chair thing.
OneMoreSoberLoki (11:50:55 PM): Oooh, I'm having vodka in my chocolate milk. It's really quite yummy.
aterryblepun (11:52:11 PM): Sounds good.
OneMoreSoberLoki (11:53:20 PM): Yummmmm.
OneMoreSoberLoki (11:55:42 PM): And it tastes like an innocent beverage. My Mum never knows.
aterryblepun (11:56:09 PM): Then how is that 'yummy'?
OneMoreSoberLoki (11:56:42 PM): The warming burn as it glides down one's gullet is delicious.
aterryblepun (11:57:25 PM): Then explain again how your mother doesn't tell? Is she just really stupid?
OneMoreSoberLoki (11:58:10 PM): She doesn't like chocolate milk. She never tastes it. But she smells it, and it's still undetectable.
OneMoreSoberLoki (11:58:46 PM): Hee! I am so wickedly clever. And a little sloshed, actually. You're sort of cute.
aterryblepun (11:59:10 PM): I see. This is a good system. It is a better system to get your mum not to care, but this is almost as good.
aterryblepun (11:59:24 PM): Thanks.
OneMoreSoberLoki (12:02:20 AM): You're fascinating when you ignore me, did you know that?
aterryblepun (12:04:16 AM): Well, I find it more fascinating when I'm ignoring you. So in a sense, yes.
OneMoreSoberLoki (12:05:06 AM): Aww, we're getting along so well, aren't we? My Mum says when a boy agrees with you it's because he likes you.
aterryblepun (12:06:15 AM): That could make sense if your mum consistently tends to be wrong.
OneMoreSoberLoki (12:09:42 AM): Oops, sorry for making you wait. I fell off my chair and didn't notice right away.
aterryblepun (12:11:36 AM): That you fell off your chair? You're fucking pissed, aren't yeh?
OneMoreSoberLoki (12:12:06 AM): I've only had three chocolate milks so far! I can't be swotty yet.
OneMoreSoberLoki (12:12:17 AM): Snot possible.
aterryblepun (12:13:12 AM): Did you not eat today?
OneMoreSoberLoki (12:13:50 AM): Erm... I think I forgot again. No! No! I had toast.
aterryblepun (12:14:50 AM): Toast.
OneMoreSoberLoki (12:15:43 AM): Toast. Really warm sliced bread. With some strawberry preserves.
aterryblepun (12:16:27 AM): spreadable fruit, or jam?
OneMoreSoberLoki (12:17:00 AM): Spendable fruit. Yeah.
aterryblepun (12:17:31 AM): Jam is better.
OneMoreSoberLoki (12:19:05 AM): Why is jam better?
aterryblepun (12:20:09 AM): It tastes better. Do I look like a cook to you?
OneMoreSoberLoki (12:21:12 AM): Sure. Some cooks are cute and blurry. Right? Not Emeril. Emeril looks like he got hit in the stomach with the flat of a shovel and never got over it.
aterryblepun (12:22:39 AM): I've never seen Emeril, nor do I have any interest in doing so.
aterryblepun (12:22:59 AM): Nigella Lawson, however...
OneMoreSoberLoki (12:23:02 AM): That's prolly good. BAM! Makes the head hurt.
OneMoreSoberLoki (12:23:22 AM): Ooh, I know who she is. She's just blurry, not cute.
aterryblepun (12:24:25 AM): Blurry?
OneMoreSoberLoki (12:24:38 AM): Like fuzzy but only at the edges?
aterryblepun (12:27:03 AM): This is a bad explanation.
OneMoreSoberLoki (12:28:01 AM): Well pardon me Mr Boot - hey, I bought some new boots last week. Leather. Black ones. They have these laces that go all the way up under my skirt. Mum doesn't know I have them yet.
OneMoreSoberLoki (12:29:00 AM): Mum is SUCh a killjoy.
aterryblepun (12:33:15 AM): This is their purpose.
OneMoreSoberLoki (12:35:30 AM): Are you talking to other girls, Terry? I will be very displeased if you are. Boys don't talk to other girls when they are talking to girls they like, my Mum says.
OneMoreSoberLoki (12:36:33 AM): Of course my Mum is on her third marriage so maybe she's not the most reliable source...
aterryblepun (12:36:54 AM): hah.
OneMoreSoberLoki (12:37:24 AM): I'm sleepy now. And the chair isn't good for sleeping. I fall off it.
OneMoreSoberLoki (12:37:44 AM): More chocolate milk!
OneMoreSoberLoki (12:38:14 AM): Would you like some undetectable chocolate milk, Terry?
aterryblepun (12:40:04 AM): I would, assuming that it is not the chocolate milk that is undetectable. Alas, I have no chocolate milk
OneMoreSoberLoki (12:41:49 AM): That's a terrible shame. I have to go to sleep now, Mum is making me go off the computer. I was shouting at my brother to leave me alone, and now I'm in trouble. Goodnight, Terry-Who-Likes-Me.
OneMoreSoberLoki (12:42:39 AM): Will your friends be terribly scandalized that you like a Muggle?
aterryblepun (12:43:34 AM): No, especially since it is not true.
OneMoreSoberLoki (12:44:13 AM): How cruel! You agreed with me earlier, and that means you like me!
aterryblepun (12:45:28 AM): My heart goes out to you.
OneMoreSoberLoki (12:45:44 AM): Fine! You're far too inattentive to my needs, Terry Boot. I'm dumping you. Yes, I'M dumping YOU. And that's just what I'm going to tell everyone! So don't get any ideas about saying you dumped me, because it's just not on.
aterryblepun (12:46:05 AM): Righto.
OneMoreSoberLoki (12:46:51 AM): Gods, but you're cute when you're indifferent... no! You won't seduce me again with your chill exterior! Goodnight!
BWAaaahhaaaaahaaa! I amuse me.