(no subject)
Where did everyone go?
A friend of mine mentioned, while flipping through my livejournal, that I don't mention any of those people anymore. Who are they? Where did they go?
It's a good question. Was I just a namedropper? Did i mention then to justify their relationship and function in my life? She said she does want me to mention her in my LJ cause it means that she might fall off the page like so many before her. But it makes me think about me.
Why can't I hold on to anything? Why is everything in my life temporary? Do I go or do they go?
When I was dating Daniel I wrote everything about him in here, I'm dating Louis and I write nothing about him. He hardly gets a mention.
But I love him, am I protecting him from a world I created? He's real, I never really knew if Daniel was real. I'm gonna type only until my hands want to type. Not forever anymore.
Someday I'll get back to the me that was, but maybe now the me now is what matter.
Just...
be... i guess. The way it is, We can't base this thing on importance in my life, maybe this isn't as important as it was, maybe I'm better, but, then why am i guilty all the time?
I live with perpetual guilt about everything. I ask lots of questions to. Questions I don't know answers or want to know answers to. I think right now this is just me typing so words will be down, and words will make sense. When I look to the sky.
Everything... I need to be more coherent and less at the same time. Fly away.
Read quick, cause this will be temporary, and deleted in the future.
A friend of mine mentioned, while flipping through my livejournal, that I don't mention any of those people anymore. Who are they? Where did they go?
It's a good question. Was I just a namedropper? Did i mention then to justify their relationship and function in my life? She said she does want me to mention her in my LJ cause it means that she might fall off the page like so many before her. But it makes me think about me.
Why can't I hold on to anything? Why is everything in my life temporary? Do I go or do they go?
When I was dating Daniel I wrote everything about him in here, I'm dating Louis and I write nothing about him. He hardly gets a mention.
But I love him, am I protecting him from a world I created? He's real, I never really knew if Daniel was real. I'm gonna type only until my hands want to type. Not forever anymore.
Someday I'll get back to the me that was, but maybe now the me now is what matter.
Just...
be... i guess. The way it is, We can't base this thing on importance in my life, maybe this isn't as important as it was, maybe I'm better, but, then why am i guilty all the time?
I live with perpetual guilt about everything. I ask lots of questions to. Questions I don't know answers or want to know answers to. I think right now this is just me typing so words will be down, and words will make sense. When I look to the sky.
Everything... I need to be more coherent and less at the same time. Fly away.
Read quick, cause this will be temporary, and deleted in the future.