(no subject)
i'm bored. i don't want to go to sleep. at all. i don't know what i want at all. i don't know anything anymore. i am sad. and i don't know why. i'm tired of being me. i wish i could leave this place and go somewhere where nobody knows me and i can start over. i could be anybody. i just don't want to be me right now. i'm sick of always caring what people think, even though i know that shouldn't matter. this is awful. i am so tired of everything. there are too many what-ifs and it's driving me insane. there are so many things going through my head right now.. i just want to be able to move on with my life. pretend things don't matter, like they haven't affected me or changed anything. but i can't and i hate it. i want so badly to leave. i hate it here. i hate feeling the way i feel...i'm tired of being so damn lonely all the time and hearing about how happy everybody else is. when do i get to be happy? never. i will never get to be happy. i wish i knew who i was. i'm so tired of waiting for something good. i'm so tired of being so pathetic and such a loser and a horrible friend. i guess i just want too many things. too many things i will never have. i hate right now...just like always. i need a new me.