(no subject)
enough vacation, im ready to go fucking home.
i think ive hit an all time grumpy. im sick of being in a hotel, not sleeping right, and being anywhere but home.
my minds in such a jumble. ive been thinking a lot. trying to figure out why i cant hold attachment, why i cant get close, why i always do the same damn thing. Ive hurt a lot of people in my life. and ive never meant to. i always feel like shit about it and try to do things that i really dont want to do to make them happy. but in the end im always not happy.
But what im thinking makes me uneasy. it goes against most of my beliefs and will make my life a little bit fucking harder than it already can be. Ive always believed that gender shouldnt decide if you can love a person or not, but ive only ever been in love with a girl not too sure if it was mutual, but i loved her more than anything. It seems easier for me to fall for them.Im just more comfortable with them. beautiful minds and bodies.
no matter how hard ive tried to love a guy, or how much ive ever wanted to, ive never been able to. its costed me a best friend. but i definately think this is why. plain out, i think im a lesbian. ugh that makes me so uncomfortable. i cant accept it. i feel like im fucking 13. my mothers going to love this one.
i think ive hit an all time grumpy. im sick of being in a hotel, not sleeping right, and being anywhere but home.
my minds in such a jumble. ive been thinking a lot. trying to figure out why i cant hold attachment, why i cant get close, why i always do the same damn thing. Ive hurt a lot of people in my life. and ive never meant to. i always feel like shit about it and try to do things that i really dont want to do to make them happy. but in the end im always not happy.
But what im thinking makes me uneasy. it goes against most of my beliefs and will make my life a little bit fucking harder than it already can be. Ive always believed that gender shouldnt decide if you can love a person or not, but ive only ever been in love with a girl not too sure if it was mutual, but i loved her more than anything. It seems easier for me to fall for them.Im just more comfortable with them. beautiful minds and bodies.
no matter how hard ive tried to love a guy, or how much ive ever wanted to, ive never been able to. its costed me a best friend. but i definately think this is why. plain out, i think im a lesbian. ugh that makes me so uncomfortable. i cant accept it. i feel like im fucking 13. my mothers going to love this one.