Apr 01, 2007 02:57
What I want for me right now will never happen. I really want to be with someone right now and it's kind of easy to say I love them without ever really meeting them person to person, but this person is the best, sweetest and most amazing guy I have ever come in contact with in my life, but I don't think it's ever going to happen. I'm not able to move to be with him, and obviously he is not able to move to be with me since it hasn't happened, and there are just far better guys out there for him that are closer and that's what he deserves. He deserves someone who can be there for him and he just really needs someone close he can rely on and be with; and that sadly isn't me. Unless something drastic happens by years end- maybe it's just time to give up things? I don't know. I'm so damn confused and I just find myself at a loss of words for the first time as to what I want or what I am going to do with this.
I applied at about 8 places to get a job to work to get money to try to be with him, but I didn't get hired at any place at all- but I tried. I just don't know what to do anymore.