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It has been so long since I have done this but here we go...
I dont know what is wrong with me! I have never been this depressed in my life! I try and act like it doesnt bother me but all I do is think about him and want to be with him! I honestly think I made a mistake by ending it but I know that I need time to grow up myself before I get into anything serious! I just know that he is perfect for me and all of my friends agree! I just hope that this gets easier because I cannot continue like this!! I cry myself to sleep at night and never want to get out of bed!! This is not like me at all! I can usually get over something pretty quick but not this!! I just dont know what else to do because my friends try and help me out but it is just so hard to pretend like I dont care about him!! I love everything about him!! Even though there is some stuff I could probably do without but he is an amazing guy and deserves someone so much better than me!! I just hope that he doesnt feel like this because if so I dont think I could live with myself. Everytime we talk I act like I am ok but tonight I called him because I cannot deal with it all! I started crying and telling him that I needed him because I do. He always made me smile when my world was falling apart. And now everytime I close my eyes I see his smile and so much in my apartment reminds me of him! It is crazy that I feel like this after us only being together for a little while!! I just know that I waited forever for him and when I got him it was amazing and then I had to ruin it!! I just honestly can see myself with him and I want us to be ok but I cannot go on like this!! I just hope that this gets easier!! I hope he knows that I love him more than anything in this world and ever since he left my world has fallen apart!!
I dont know what is wrong with me! I have never been this depressed in my life! I try and act like it doesnt bother me but all I do is think about him and want to be with him! I honestly think I made a mistake by ending it but I know that I need time to grow up myself before I get into anything serious! I just know that he is perfect for me and all of my friends agree! I just hope that this gets easier because I cannot continue like this!! I cry myself to sleep at night and never want to get out of bed!! This is not like me at all! I can usually get over something pretty quick but not this!! I just dont know what else to do because my friends try and help me out but it is just so hard to pretend like I dont care about him!! I love everything about him!! Even though there is some stuff I could probably do without but he is an amazing guy and deserves someone so much better than me!! I just hope that he doesnt feel like this because if so I dont think I could live with myself. Everytime we talk I act like I am ok but tonight I called him because I cannot deal with it all! I started crying and telling him that I needed him because I do. He always made me smile when my world was falling apart. And now everytime I close my eyes I see his smile and so much in my apartment reminds me of him! It is crazy that I feel like this after us only being together for a little while!! I just know that I waited forever for him and when I got him it was amazing and then I had to ruin it!! I just honestly can see myself with him and I want us to be ok but I cannot go on like this!! I just hope that this gets easier!! I hope he knows that I love him more than anything in this world and ever since he left my world has fallen apart!!