Yes, that feeling of fullness! Oh my god, yes. It's such a sensuous fullness as well, I think, as in that it fills more than just a few senses. I mean, I can feel really full and nourished acting-wise with someone like Rainsy, because of his skills. But with Connie you get so many other things, too. You get that hypnotic charm and attractivenss, you get the acting skill, you get the erotic fulfillment and the beauty. And then you get the super-physical acting where he's so present in his body and inhabits his space so perfectly, and I wonder if it isn't that thing that causes that sensation, too. Because we think of the actions we see and sort of mirror them psychologically when we watch someone move (the mirror neurons thing), so watching him involves us on some minute, minute unperceptible level in our musculature as well. So he takes the mind, the body, the spirit, the intellect, the sexual desire... all these things and uses them for his performance. Normally actors manipulate just one or two things, but as with the genders, he just takes all of them and spins us this wonderful, all-absorbing performance. Or am I talking bollocks? Because I do think the physicality might be one of those really "filling" aspects.
And I am WTFing at him too, because I always thought I had such super-specific loves and fetishes that nobody could fill them, and still don't think it's likely I'll ever find anyone IRL to fill them. It's not just a goth/Romantic thing or a kinky thing, I don't think. There are so many other types of longings I have as well that don't directly overlap with those, even if they are a huge part of why he resonates with me so. Clearly we have to make some checklists of our desires and our... well, our fucking EXISTENCES to see how many of our attributes and desires and loves he matches. Because he's fucking ridiculous.
And, well, it's actually funny to see how similar you and I are about these things! It's both a relief and slightly eerie at times. What sorts of ingredients make a Bride of Veidt? What sorts of life events, upbringings, parents, friends, movies, books, philosophies? Because no two people are ever the same, and he and you and I all grew up in different countries and things, led different lives, are of different generations, yet still... there's something so essentially deep in him that touches one at the very core.
It really would be interesting if we could research the whole way in which Connie claims fans in general, just beyond Tumblr and such. It was just the usual suspects who replied to that post I made about the hypnagogic Connie invasions and stuff. But you probably saw amormoveosol's letter--remarkable how there does seem to be a pattern. Although she's so young that I doubt he comes to her the same way he comes to us--she's one of the teengoth Cesare fans--so it's definitely not similar there. I wonder if there are certain Connie fan tribes, even... and I'm glad the screaming pervert tribeswomen are finally coming out thanks to Tumblr, because they certainly kept their mouths quiet on the mailing list what with all the old conservative people on there :P
Absolutely! He somehow encompasses so many things all at once, and you've hit on a really fascinating point that I hadn't considered at all - that we as viewers are indeed very much involved, become very much a part of his performance, particularly in terms of that minute participation in all of that wonderful physical stuff he does... Because yeah, the effect it has - on me at least - is something akin to being gently, but firmly guided. 'All-absorbing' is such an excellent way to describe it! Because one does get *completely* immersed in watching him. There is something so incredibly hypnotic about that wholeness he brings, isn't there? I'm the same, I can get my satisfactions from various individuals, for various different things, but only ever ONE of those things for each, be it acting or singing or attractiveness... whatever. But it's as you say - he is all that AND THEN FUCKING SOME. I do think the physicality thing attributes to that "filling' thing, yes! Because in a lot of ways, to me, he speaks with his body... In fact he communicates more to us with a slight hand gesture or an eye flicker than words ever could, which is *absolutely* fascinating and riveting and I've not seen anyone else do that sort of thing, ever... And if you're talking bollocks then I speak fluent balls or something, because this all really resonates with me.
Mmm, haha. It is pretty strange sometimes how similar we seem to experience these things. But again, so interesting to think about. There must be *something* in the way that each life unfolds that causes stuff like that to happen... similarities or qualities. Perhaps it is that deepness in him, and once you tap into it - or indeed it taps into you - some sort of profound thing happens that brings about a kind of mutuality. I don't know, that probably sounds a little cuckoo.
Is that mailing list still going? Aahahaha! Behold, the pervert tribeswomen of Tumblr, who dedicate themselves entirely to the rite of Die Veidt (and all the yelling and sexually frustrated fits of rage that apply).
*fluently teabags his face together with you* We understand each other's balls! Basically, yes to everything you said about the physicality. And to the fact that he does so many things and has so many qualities together in one person that most actors only have one of. That way he can communicate entire worlds of emotion with his gestures is just absolutely phenomenal, even beyond your usual dance acting or silent movie acting, I think. I've seen magnificent dance performances and yet still have come away from them a bit WTF because they've been cryptic and symbolic to an extent where I think only the choreographer and the performer have ever truly 'got' them. But when it's Connie, you immediately get what he means because his emotions are just so clearly writ upon his face. It's unlike any body acting/dancing I've ever seen before.
All the Yahoo mailing lists seem to be a bit dead now, and I don't even want to go on the Veidt one in case they're talking shit about me, which might be the case. So ho hum.
And yeah, I don't know why we're experiencing things in a similar way--it's like the way you read about some Buddhist monks having the exact same experiences when some spirit comes to hang out with them, but I've always brushed that stuff off as coming from the scriptures and the expectations those guys have in the first place. But... but... what the hell are our scriptures and spiritual frameworks, for him to click into place like that, so perfectly?!? It's fucking ridiculous. I'm sure there's plenty there to explain and to mine in perfectly rational psychological ways, but that doesn't change the fact that it still *feels* like a fucking X-File. Bastarding ghost wanker.
And I am WTFing at him too, because I always thought I had such super-specific loves and fetishes that nobody could fill them, and still don't think it's likely I'll ever find anyone IRL to fill them. It's not just a goth/Romantic thing or a kinky thing, I don't think. There are so many other types of longings I have as well that don't directly overlap with those, even if they are a huge part of why he resonates with me so. Clearly we have to make some checklists of our desires and our... well, our fucking EXISTENCES to see how many of our attributes and desires and loves he matches. Because he's fucking ridiculous.
And, well, it's actually funny to see how similar you and I are about these things! It's both a relief and slightly eerie at times. What sorts of ingredients make a Bride of Veidt? What sorts of life events, upbringings, parents, friends, movies, books, philosophies? Because no two people are ever the same, and he and you and I all grew up in different countries and things, led different lives, are of different generations, yet still... there's something so essentially deep in him that touches one at the very core.
It really would be interesting if we could research the whole way in which Connie claims fans in general, just beyond Tumblr and such. It was just the usual suspects who replied to that post I made about the hypnagogic Connie invasions and stuff. But you probably saw amormoveosol's letter--remarkable how there does seem to be a pattern. Although she's so young that I doubt he comes to her the same way he comes to us--she's one of the teengoth Cesare fans--so it's definitely not similar there. I wonder if there are certain Connie fan tribes, even... and I'm glad the screaming pervert tribeswomen are finally coming out thanks to Tumblr, because they certainly kept their mouths quiet on the mailing list what with all the old conservative people on there :P
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Mmm, haha. It is pretty strange sometimes how similar we seem to experience these things. But again, so interesting to think about. There must be *something* in the way that each life unfolds that causes stuff like that to happen... similarities or qualities. Perhaps it is that deepness in him, and once you tap into it - or indeed it taps into you - some sort of profound thing happens that brings about a kind of mutuality. I don't know, that probably sounds a little cuckoo.
Is that mailing list still going? Aahahaha! Behold, the pervert tribeswomen of Tumblr, who dedicate themselves entirely to the rite of Die Veidt (and all the yelling and sexually frustrated fits of rage that apply).
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All the Yahoo mailing lists seem to be a bit dead now, and I don't even want to go on the Veidt one in case they're talking shit about me, which might be the case. So ho hum.
And yeah, I don't know why we're experiencing things in a similar way--it's like the way you read about some Buddhist monks having the exact same experiences when some spirit comes to hang out with them, but I've always brushed that stuff off as coming from the scriptures and the expectations those guys have in the first place. But... but... what the hell are our scriptures and spiritual frameworks, for him to click into place like that, so perfectly?!? It's fucking ridiculous. I'm sure there's plenty there to explain and to mine in perfectly rational psychological ways, but that doesn't change the fact that it still *feels* like a fucking X-File. Bastarding ghost wanker.
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